Six Feet Under The Stars
by notthtgurl
Summary: Life doesn't hurt until you think about how much things have changed , who you've lost along the way , and how much of it was your fault ". I became so focused on making everyone know Lily Luna , that I forgot what it meant to be a Potter. Now I'm lost.
1. Time to Lay Claim To The Evidence

**Okay , this is the sequel to "Anyone but Me" and "The Manly Diary Of Mr Maturity "**

**if you havent read one of them , you probably should , but i guess you dont nessecarily have to.**

**Uhhhh**

**This is pretty short , because I've never done Lily's p.O.V before .**

**Sooooo please guys let me know what you think or ask me any questions you might have . The only thing i ask is that you do it nicely , but most of you do that anyway .**

**Im really excited about this story , but also kinda nervous as you can clearly see beacause i am literally babbling .**

**okay enough now ...... ONWARD!!!!**

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"Lily !"

" LILY!!"

" LILY POTTER YOU WILL NOT RUIN THIS DAY FOR ME .GET YOUR LAZY ASS UP!!"

I flinched, and tried to hide under my covers as my older brother flipped on my lights.

" THE TRAIN LEAVES IN TWO HOURS GET UP NOW!"

I rolled my eyes , having no intention of getting up unless my mother came in and _personally_ dragged me out of my bed .

" Get out James !" I said from under my covers .

It was silent for a second. I was actually foolish enough to think he had listened to me , until........

" HIYAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

" UGH!"

I had the breath knocked out of me ,as the weight of and eighteen year old boy crushed me .

" GET OFF!" I yelled, struggling to breath .

" GET UP!" he yelled back.

" NO!"

" THEN I'M NOT GETTING OFF !"

" HOW OLD ARE YOU!???" I yelled louder ,as he jumped up and down on my bed .

" OLD ENOUGH TO GET MYSELF OUT OF BED! "

" GET OUT!" I yelled again .

Thankfully , he jumped down. " Fine , I'll get out . But if your not up in ten minutes , I'm coming back with a water gun. I will not be late for my seventh year because you're an insufferable troll in the mornings!"

I threw a pillow at him ,as he slammed my door .

It wasn't even worth trying to go back to sleep . I could practically hear him down at the kitchen sink filling up one of his water canon things . That had always been a strange thing about James , he had his entire closet stacked with weapons of every variety . Water guns, catapults , slingshots ,he had a huge metal pipe in there at one time . Basically it had never occurred to him that if anyone were ever to attack us it would be a wizard , in which case a _pipe_ wouldn't exactly be a choice weapon .

All that weapon nonsense was probably out the window though , because now he could legally do magic . In fact I was sure that he would have just jinxed me out of bed a minute ago , had Mum not forbid him to even think about doing magic in the house unless it was a emergency .

This policy was invoked because ever since he and Wood got their apparition licenses, they have been dong it non stop. SO magic is banned , and if James violates that rule he wont be able to take his muggle driving test next Summer .

I sighed at the thought of James behind the wheel of a car , somthing that had haunted my dreams since he brought it up at the beginning of the summer , and climbed out of bed .

Getting dressed was a boring process , I didn't go over board with my hair or makeup .I didn't see a reason too .

James had apparently already gotten my trunk from my room . So now I had nothing to do , but sit and wait for them to call me downstairs so I could be shipped off to my personal prison for the next year.

I have to be the only one who isn't excited about this year. That's all everyone had been talking about for the last three days , even at the burrow all last week , they were going on and on .I just don't see the reason for it . But of course I was the only one ...... as per usual .

James was almost counting down the days . Apparently his last year couldn't come soon enough . Of course he'd be excited , freedom was so close . Not only that but he's been wanting to get away for a while now . After Teddy and Victiore's wedding , he kept in contact with this girl named Julie . He really liked her , that much was obvious , but about a month ago he got a call from her , she was vacationing in Italy . Apparently she had met some guy named Paolo or some nonsense like that . James tried to pretend like it didn't hurt him , and everyone else pretended like we didn't know he was pretending . Needless to say he'll be grateful to get out of range of her weekly phone calls about the new purse Paolo had bought her . I suppose letters will be easier to ignore.

Al was excited too. Though his reason is a little crazy in my opinion . My other lovable brother also had some relationship issues this summer . His " _girlfriend_" Leahah , decided that they should " _take a break_" at least until school started , and then they could decide what to do from there . Apparently Al is under the impression that when he sees her later today, everything will go back to the way it was at the end of last year.

Well I know Leahah , so ....... I know it wont . I just don't have the heart to tell Al.

Hugo's also ecstatic, though his reason I can sort of begin to understand . See my older cousin Fred and his best friend Grizz graduated last year . That means that there are now two vacant positions on the Gryffindor quidditch team ( both beaters , had it been anything else I may have tried out , but I have a rubbish swing ). Hugo thinks that since there will be two rookies on the team , he will no longer be the weakest link .. . which is to say the stooge . Plus , since Fred and Grizz are gone , he figures he'll get a little more say in this group of ours , almost like their absence will make him seem older . Now before you start to think that that's pathetic you have to understand that Hugo has never had authority over ANYTHING. He was always cool about it , followed behind and kept his mouth shut , but I think Hugh wants a little time to shine . Plus Fred told him some rubbish about how the fate of Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes rests on his shoulders . I think that is a dramatization of epic proportions , but hey .... what do I know?

And Rose , oh I_ know_how excited Rose is . She tries not to show it , even goes so far as to pretend that she dreads it . But I know the truth . She is absolutely DYING to flaunt her new relationship to Hogwarts and if I'm perfectly honest , I am rather psyched to see some reactions myself . God I hope I'm around when her ex sees them , the slimy toad. See last year Rose dated this slytherin idiot named Nick Layndon . The problem with this was _A ._Layndon was an douche bag and _B._ she was uncompromisingly in love with my _as good as adopted brother_ Jordan Wood .

Well Layndon cheated on her , embarrassed her , and then pretty much got the shit kicked out of him repeatedly by various members of team Rose . Leaving her to realize that she did in fact love Wood, and that he was an infinitely better choice for her . They hooked up at Victiore's wedding .

And I haven't heard the end of it since then . That's another thing no one will shut up about . Mum , Dad, Uncle Ron, Aunt Hermione , James , AL , Mum Weasley , even Uncle Percy pulled his head out of the minister's ass long enough to get a word in . Because it wasn't a normal teenage relationship like we were all expecting .

Rose is an emotional time bomb , with a temper to rival an eruptive volcano . Jordan has a ridiculous amount of baggage , with his dysfunctional family and all , and he tries to be as emotionless as possible . We all knew they were gonna end up dating , but we were also pretty sure that they'd drive each other crazy . One of those fanatical on – off relationships like Teddy and Victiore had . But its not , it's almost like ...... they're already married . Not in bad way or anything , their relationship is almost ... adult , its not juvenile . Yeah they have petty fights, and annoy one and other , but the way the know each other and take care of each other . You would seriously think they were married . It was just so natural , like they'd been together since the day they were born .

It's really not fair , I mean everyone else has nothing but crap relationships , and we mine as well be picking their invitation designs!

I am happy for them though , they need each other . At the begging of the Summer , Wood's Mum and Dad had a major row . Apparently Ms. Stacey ( his Mum) ended up going to live with her sister in America , and good old Oliver is with his quidditch mob right now . Neither one of them even thought about Jordan though , they pretty much abandoned him , he could have gone to the states with his Mum , but I'm glad he didn't he gets into a lot of trouble there .He stayed alone at that house for a week , still hasn't told anyone but James , my Dad ,and Rose exactly what was said during the row . At first he had point blank refused to leave his house . He wanted to stay there on his own . Rose went over there one day and changed his mind though . Didn't ask how.... don't really want to know , so he came here .

He's nearly wetting himself with excitement as well. I heard him yesterday going on and on about quidditch , and scouts , and getting signed . Mum actually took him to work a few times so he could talk to some quidditch legends and what not . He's also particularly eager to see Layndon again . Rose told him not to start anything , but honestly with the history between those two all Jordan will have to do is walk past him and all hell will break lose .

It should be interesting .

I however, have nothing to look forward to except for the aforementioned chaos that could possibly ensue due to my rather obnoxious family. There's no one at Hogwarts that I particularly miss , I pretty much despise all my classes, I have no boyfriend ......

As in I haven't had a successful relationship like ...... ever

My last _"boyfriend_" was a Hufflepuff named Cody Gaines. He seemed alright , until it occurred to me that all we ever did was snog . When I brought this fact to his attention and told him I didn't want it to be like that , he very gracefully dumped me two days later .

And then the "_ice bitch_" rumors started .

Oh yeah , I cant wait to go back to a place where every guy thinks I'm a spoiled little tease , and every girl thinks I'm a stuck up bitch .

UHG!

There is nothing special about fourth year either .

Last year we got to go to Hogsmeade for the first time , next year we have our O.W.L.S.

WHAT ABOUT NOW!

I need something to distract me from my pathetic life .... or lack there of ....

Maybe I should just suck it up and try out for the quidditch team ...... and if I suck , then I can be the water girl .

" LILY LETS GO!" My Mum's voice rang from downstairs .

Grudgingly I walked down .

It seems like every year I get less and less excited and............

"Oh for the love of Merlin!"

James was attempting to do **the worm** on our **coffee table** . He was chanting something like " S_eventh year , seventh year_ ".

And of course Wood was being the typical instigator by taking a video of it on his phone . Al just looked amused .

Then Mum walked in .

" JAMES !MY COFFEE TABLE IS **NOT** A DANCE FLOOR , GET OFF, GROW UP, AND GET IN THE CAR ! IF I HAVE TO YELL AT YOU ONE MORE TIME TODAY THERE WILL BE NO SEVENTH YEAR YOU CAN GO STRAIT TO WORK MOPING FLOORS AT THE MINISTRY ! AND JORDAN I WANT THAT VIDEO DELETED, WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT ENCOURAGING HIM!"

James and Wood acted like they hadn't even been yelled at ... I guess you become immune to it after a while .

I was the last one into the van , so I was shoved in the back next to Al .

I promise you this now .... if I have to hear James squeal out ONE more song about being a seventh year, I will find a way to suffocate myself in the seat cushions .

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**Remember this is just an intro ....... what do you think so far?**


	2. Fingerprints Sold Me Out

**Good news!!**

**i have a beta!!!**

**yayyyyyyy!!!! Tesco Metro you are aHmazing!!!**

**thank you so much**

**i hope you guys like this one....... lemme kno !!!**

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King's cross looked the same as it always had—filled with worried parents and scared children, obnoxious teenagers, and snarky management. You know , those old guys that glare at you when you walk past like your about to ignite the building .

James had thankfully managed to shut up for the time being. But that's mostly because he'd gotten a text from Julie right before we turned into the parking lot. He was now in the _"cone of silence"_ stage, which meant he'd vent to Wood later. He's been doing that all summer . Two hours of silence and then ten minutes of sitting in his room, throwing stuff at his walls , and screaming at Wood.

Personally, I didn't feel bad for him. He should have left his phone at home like the rest of us. I mean what was the point in bringing it? It's not like he can take it to school. He was tempting fate, really. And now Al was the one refusing to shut up. He was going on and on about Leahah. I think he wanted me to give him advice, but I don't think "get the fuck over her" would sit to well with him.

It didn't take long for us to find the Weasleys'._ One_ because their ridiculously flamboyant hair color, and _two_ because Wood seems to have developed some kind of in-head tracking device—like a navigational system. You know that muggle device , Teddy has one in his car , but he has no idea how to use it . Anyway Jordan was able to find Rose within minutes of crossing the barrier. He kind of reminds me of the dog in that muggle movie.... Lassie , I think it's name was . I guess we'll be set if Rose ever falls down a well.

"Hey Lil!" Hugo exclaimed as our two families merged together to form a giant looming group.

" Hey." I said.

Hugo is the closest thing I have to a best friend . He's the person I fall back on , always has been . Like all through my childhood , whenever my brothers ditched me because I was " too young" I had Hugo. He's a bit of an idiot , and I get frustrated with him a lot , but he's the one person in my life I _know_ will never hurt me .

"You don't look excited." Hugo observed, taking a step back as I glared at him. He knew how I felt about this year . But he just kept smiling and saying " _Oh Lily , your just nervous_ ." No , no see I would be nervous if something was actually going on this year . It's going to be hopelessly boring and therefore I want no part in it. Just another year for me to wallow around the castle and try to keep my family out of trouble . Just another year to be Little Lilly Potter . Woo – freaking-whoo.

" I told you how much I was dreading this and listening to James compose a ballad about his seventh year using only his house keys and the buttons on his cell phone as instruments didn't exactly improve my outlook on things."

" My mum and sister had one of those heart to heart moments in the car" he said .

" Hugo, you have to stop getting so uncomfortable so easy." I said. Hugh has issues with his feelings . He gets really awkward when people start crying or being gushy . He especially hates it when his Mom and sister talk about things that he ( or any guy really) would rather not think about.

" Well it wasn't like they were talking about your... girly time...."

" Say period Hugo." I said, smirking as he cringed . I'm a kind of insensitive when it comes to Hugo's awkwardness . I love bringing up things that make him uncomfortable. It really is rather amusing , watching him squirm and such . He never gets mad at me though , he knows I'm just messing with him.

" Shut Up Lily, it wasn't anything gross like that . It was just Rose whining to Mum about how worried she is with the whole Wood and Layndon thing."

" Well, it's not gonna be good Hugh," I said, "the only positive thing about this is that Fred and Grizz aren't here to encourage anything."

" I'm really gonna miss them."

Fred and Grizz graduated last year . They were pretty much the glue holding us all together so , I don't know what it will be like without them . They are my brothers when my real brothers are being assholes . I will miss them terribly , actually I think the whole school will. It's going to be really quiet around the castle with them away.

" Yeah so am I, but it's probably better that their not here....What?" I asked, as he was staring over my shoulder.

" Sometimes I think your psychic," he mumbled.

" AYYY WEASLAAAAAAYS!!!!"

I turned around and sure enough there was my cousin, Fred Weasley, and his best friend –turned business partner ( they took over the Diagon Alley branch of Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes) Reggie Grizzwold, coming towards us. They were riding on a luggage cart actually—it was rather obnoxious. Hugo looked so proud which, in itself, is really pathetic. He idolizes them as if they were gods , not just his friends .

" Fred Weasley would it kill you to act your age?" my Aunt Hermione scolded.

" And fine morning to you Aunt Hermy!" he boomed.

" Thought you boys couldn't get off this morning?" Dad asked.

" Well we had to come and see the wee-ones off!" Grizz explained.

I rolled my eyes . Grizz was about 6'5" so we were all wee ones to him. They looked so much older . Fred looked like he was attempting to grow a beard for the love of Merlin ! I really wanted them to come back to school with us , but I didn't say that . It would send their egos through the roof.

" Well you'd better hurry since they've got less then ten minutes." Mum said, already tearing up ( mostly cause it's James' last year.)

" Right well , first off James and Al we expect you to oversee the pranking and ensure that it continues in our absence . Hugo still needs more training . Wood, quidditch is totally in your hands , but that's not even a concern , so we'll try to make as many games as we can to ruefully critique our replacements."

" Oh and as for Layndon , even if he sucker punches you, make sure you get a few good swings in before you actually kill him."

" GRIZZ!" Rose exclaimed.

" Furthermore, Rose and Lily, do not start acting skanky just because you're older. Especially you Rose, because we know who your boyfriend is, and even though James and the Slytherins wouldn't get the job done we—" Fred continued.

" Okay guys that's enough, they gotta go." Dad said as he watched the look on Rose's face slowly gain ferocity.

" Right well be good little dears!" Fred said.

" And do tell Mcgoogles we said hey!" Grizz added cheerfully.

I rolled my eyes and turned to say goodbye to my sobbing Mother and my " _trying to remain calm_" father. They gave me the usual " please be good and keep up with your studies " and I gave the usual " I will , don't worry , I'll write soon." . And then I was off.

Surprisingly Leahah was waiting for me in our compartment when I got there, and since my family hadn't boarded yet (which I knew because it was obvious that Leahah was keeping a vivid watch on all of the corridors around us) she decided to tell me a novel length story in the span of about 45 seconds.

"Okay look I know Al's your brother, and you love him, and I love him too, just not in the way that I think he loves me. I need more time to think because I want to be with him, but I really like being single. So I don't know what to do, all I know is that I promised Al answers—answers that I don't have so . Please, please, please tell Rose not to be mad at me cause I'm gonna have to hide all trip. Oh shit here they come, thank you Lily you're the best!"

Then she hugged me and bolted off down the hallway.

And I said nothing.

I'm not sure what Leahah was thinking , honestly Al is so bloody stubborn that if he wants to talk to her he's _going_ to talk to her. I don't know , I mean they both want different things obviously . Al wants something serious and Leahah wants to have fun . I find it all very confusing . I need some new friends .

"Lil!" Rose practically yelled at me since I was still staring after Leahah." Is something wrong ?"

" Nope" I said walking into the compartment and watching as she plopped down across from me.

" So," I said. "Where's the hubby?"

" Lily stop." Rose said , sounding very irritated.

"What?" I asked .

"It's bad enough that everyone else is making fun of us, but I don't need to hear it from you."

"Oh come on! Like you care."

"Just lay off a little, yeah?"

I rolled my eyes at her . All summer the family has been joking around with her and Wood . She pretends to be annoyed with it , but I know it doesn't really bother her . She's so happy to finally be in a relationship with him that I'm pretty sure she doesn't care what anybody thinks .

" Fine, fine." I said teasingly "But seriously where is he? I thought you'd be watching him like a hawk."

"He's with James down at the end of the corridor talking to Sean Finnegan."

" And your not worried?" I asked .

" Well Al's with them . Plus I talked to Jordan for a long time last night and he promised me he'd stay away from any trouble. I trust him."

She smiled all sappy-like. Even though I'm glad that they're together and happy , I find the overall gushiness and cuteness of their relationship to be rather frustrating . Yeah , okay most of that is jealousy , but I also think that Rose has changed a bit . Not in a bad way or anything , she just acts more.....mature . And sometimes it seems like mature Rose , doesn't have nearly as much time for her little cousin ( i.e. me ) as she used to.

"Can you stop making that face, my brain might explode from all the insults I'm not allowed to say." I said playfully.

She rolled her eyes at me, and finally the rest of what's left of our group thing showed up.

" Look who we found in the hallway!" James said, gesturing to the boy following him.

Austin Bentley, he's a slytherin, but he's also a godsend. Like.... I don't know what we would have done without him helping out with Rose last year.

He used to be Nick Layndon's best friend . _Used to_ being the key words . He's the one who eventually told Rose that Layndon was cheating on her and taking advantage of her . He's also the one who watched over her when James decided that the family was disowning her ( mostly because of Layndon ). So that means that Layndon and all the other Slytherin cronies hate his guts . I don't think he should care personally , he's smarter than them , cooler than them , nicer than them , and definitely better looking than them.

" Will you scoot over Wood! I'm not anorexic!" James yelled, before anyone could even say hello to Austin.

"What? I'm tired" he replied, smiling that cocky smirk of his and stretching out across the seat.

" You wouldn't be tired" Rose said looking down at the head that was in her lap " if you had gone to bed at a reasonable time and not played those ridiculous video games till 3 am."

Yeah James , Al , Hugh , and Wood are all obsessed with muggle videogames now. We went to an arcade at the mall a few years ago , and Grandpa Weasley thought that they were a great way for the boys to appreciate muggle culture. I wish grandpa was in the house with them when they lost a game , then he could tell me how much he valued muggle culture.

" You were up just as long," Wood argued back, kicking James as he tried to sit down on his legs.

" Yes, because I was talking to you! "

" You didn't have to stay up."

" We were having a serious conversation," she said.

I doubt that seriously . I've witnessed the two of them stay on the phone for four hours without saying much of anything to each other . I mean Rose literally sat there reading with the phone in her hand while Jordan argued with James , about how pathetic the Chudley Cannons were on the other line. Neither of them said anything , and yet they were both perfectly content.

" Oh please," James said , standing awkwardly in the doorway as everyone else took the open seats around me ." I heard the whole conversation, you talked about Layndon for all of five minutes, then rambled on about marshmallow bunnies and whether or not applesauce was a pointless idea."

"Er, actually they weren't marshmallow bunnies, they were marshmallow peeps," Wood clarified.

Yes we are actually having this conversation .

" Same difference!" James yelled .

"No peeps are chicks." Rose said , rolling her eyes.

"Chicks, Like girl chicks or chicks like chicken chicks?" James asked , looking pathetically bemused I might add.

Unfortunately this riveting discussion was interrupted by a knock at the door.

"Hey guys " Corbin Ashley, Al's best friend was standing there. He did some kind of handshake thing with James and Al, waved to Austin and I, and rolled his eyes at Jordan and Rose.

Corbin was actually born in America , in New York. His Mum's British , she moved back to London when Corbin was 8 , because his father was killed , he was a police man. The muggle police are like aurors , except they carry guns. Those are the weapons that my brothers use to kill people in those sadistic videogames that were mentioned earlier. Anyway Corbin has just started to grow up . He's actually taller than me now ( which isn't saying much ) and he's finally starting to stand up for himself .

"Sorry to interrupt, what I'm sure was a heartwarming moment, but Rose and I have prefect duties." He said.

Rose sighed and looked down at Wood.

"You sure you don't want me to come with you?" he asked. (Layndon is the Slytherin prefect. Hence the concerned boyfriend)

"Jordan, I can handle it. I've kicked you and James' ass plenty of times."

(And Layndon's actually. That was amazing , broke his nose on the last day of term last year .)

He smiled weakly then leaned up and kissed her.

"Still," he said as she began pushing his head off her lap, "there's that spell Fred found, the one that's like pepper spray."

"I got this." Rose insisted. She pecked him one more time on the lips, before waving to us and following Corbin out of the compartment.

Of course Wood still didn't look at ease . He tends to worry a lot , sometimes it's cute and other times it can be a tad annoying .

"She'll be fine Wood." James said, finally able to take a seat, now that Wood wasn't stretched out.

" Yeah , I'd be more worried about Nick's well being." Austin joked.

Wood smiled and turned to look at him "So what's this huge quidditch emergency?"

Apparently there was a quidditch emergency..... I guess that's why Austin was in here.

"Okay remember how you said you didn't see Colby?" Austin asked.

Colby was Slytherins Quidditch Capitan last year. He was on Austin's side of the whole anti- Layndon thing. As long as he had Colby , no one would mess with Austin this year.

"Yeah?" Al said , nudging Hugo who was falling asleep next to him.

"Well that's because he moved to Canada." Austin said solemnly.

Well that sucks .

"WHAT!" Al exclaimed, as James and Wood continued to stare at him.

"Yeah they moved at the end of July. He sent the team a letter like last week, apologizing and what not. And he named the new Captain."

Okay , that's not good . I'm practically a third wheel when it comes to their quidditch talks ( even though I'm rather beast at it myself ) and even I know that's not good.

"Who is?" I asked, noticing him jump a little, probably because he forgot I was in the room. It happens a lot. I'm small , quiet , what's to notice really?

"Malfoy."

"WHAT!" Al exclaimed again.

"Why would he do that? Why not you?" James demanded, staring at Austin with wide eyes .

"Because he knew no one would listen to him after what happened last year," Wood answered for him, leaning back and running a hand through his hair. "I'm sorry man, if it hadn't been for us...."

"Don't apologize Wood," Austin said. " I'm perfectly happy with the decisions I made last year."

I smiled at him ( even though he didn't see me ). It takes a really good person to loose their friends because they don't agree with the way they're acting . Now he's loosing his sport too. And strangely enough , he really does look okay with it .

"Yeah, but now you might not even get a spot on the team. " James said.

"Oh, well I didn't have a future in Quidditch anyway."

"Yeah well neither does Malfoy," I said. I mean seriously , in my opionon Wood is an ideal quidditch captain , Scorpius looks like a complete poof next to him . It's like comparing a male model to a boxer . ( Wood being the boxer of course).

Austin looked at me and nodded. Probablu surprised that I'd spoken . I don't usually talk in front of him , least I didn't last year . Sometimes I don't talk in front of people I dotn know well because I'm afraid I'll sound stupid . Austin is very mature , he kinda intimidates me .

"It was either him, Brandon, who can't do anything without Scorpius anyway, or Layndon."

"But still, Malfoy is not Quidditch Capitan material . I mean seriously, have you seen how shiny his shoes are?" Hugo said.

"So you're really okay with not playing this year?" Jordan asked, still looking rather guilty.

"Yes" Austin said sincerely "I am. So relax."

I sat in that compartment for about another twenty minutes before I grew sick of being ignored.

So I set off exploring the corridors. I found a few of my other friends .Nancy Jordan ( who is the only girl in my dorm that I can stand ) and her boyfriend Raymond Nash , Clyde Tyrell ( who thinks that Hugo is the coolest person ever, and _might_ be gay ) , and of course the Talbot sisters Agatha and Aubree ( who are two of the most amusing human beings on earth).

Once I was bored , and in search of someone else to say hello to I ran into my favorite cousin Rosie .

"You're done already?" I asked her.

"Yeah," she said, sounding a little annoyed "I'm looking for Leahah."

" Oh you wont find her," I said soberly .

"Why...oh Godric, don't tell me she's icing Al."

"Well, yeah."

_Icing_: the method Leahah uses to run away from her exes when the relationship gets tough . She got the idea out of some magazine or something .Usually its pretty effective, only in this case the ex is my brother. My stubborn, overbearing, refuses to listen to reason, brother. So I wish Leahah all the best of luck with her _icing_ strategy.

"I knew this was gonna happen," Rose said. "I knew it—that's why I didn't want her to go out with him."

"They'll work it out Rose." I said reassuringly.

Even though I have a very strong feeling that even if they do work it out , they'll still fill our lives with heaps of unnecessary drama.

" I hope so, listen I'm going to go look for her. Can you just do me a favor and keep an eye on Al?"

Did I want to go back to that compartment? No Did I do it? Yes. Why? Because I cant say no to people if they ask me to do them a favor. (Unless it's like illegal or disgusting or whatever.)That's who I am , good old Lily Luna , always there for everyone . So yes, I trudged back to the crowded little compartment only to find Corbin being interrogated.

"So what exactly happened?" Wood demanded.

Of course this had something to do with Layndon , who I'm sure did something or made some kind of little comment to Rose , because that's just who he is . It could go wither way though . Corbin has always been dramatic so he could tell Wood what he wants to hear , and then pretend to attempt to break up the fight . OR he could realize that Rose will loose her mind if Wood starts anything , and keep his mouth shut .

Corbin sighed. "I've already told you twice, maybe if you'd stop interrupting me I could get it all out, unless you'd rather me write it down so..."

"Corbin!" Al said.

"It's not a big deal!"

"That is yet to be determined." James said.

I noticed that Austin was the only one acting rationally, which didn't really surprise me much. He's ridiculously more mature than all of them . He listens to reason, has his priorities in order AND I bet he doesn't play video games !

"All that happened was that the Nelson bitch said something about Rose getting fat and then Layndon said it was probably because she ate her weight in junk food trying to get over him."

"That's it?" Wood asked, sounding almost disappointed.

"Yes that's it! I told you it was no big deal." Corbin said sounding very exasperated.

"So the tosser actually thinks that Rose is still hung up on him?" Al asked.

"Well he does have a sickeningly large ego," Austin said. "And even when he finds out about Wood and Rose, if he doesn't know already, he'll probably still be saying that shit. Trying to get a rise out of you same as usual."

"But Rose punched him in the face," Hugo said. "How can he possibly think she's still into him?"

" Some people are like that. " Wood said " Look at James, Rian Ambler kicks him in the shins every time she sees him and last year he was determined to...."

"Didn't I say that that story was going into the never _Pretend This Never Happened _file?" James questioned.

" Honestly James there's a lot of stories in that "_file_," and I've pretty much told everyone all of them."

Then they continued to argue about this metaphorical file, and I realized that I had been standing there for nearly ten minutes and they had yet to acknowledge me. Which I must say again is pretty much typical. Though I've become rather used to it .

"Oh hey Lil," Al said finally noticing me, " have you seen Leahah?"

Are You Kidding Me?

"No Al I haven't, and I don't recommend looking for her."

And here comes the stubbornness .

"Why not?"

"Because..."

How do I say this? Because she's trying to ditch you without you realizing your being ditched…Because she's a slag who would self destruct if forced to be in a serious relationship... Because she can out run you...

"Uhhhh…"

"Because she's probably hanging with her other friends and if you follow her around she's going to think you're clingy. Just let her come to you." Austin said suddenly.

I was pleasantly surprised, I hadn't even known he was listening.

Austin can give advice. Pretty good advice, too. Al looked really satisfied with that crock of sugarcoated shit. So I sent Austin a gracious smile, which he returned with a nod, and we listened to Wood and James argue about the time James put a sock in the toaster thinking it would work like a dryer.

This all comes back to the difference in maturity thing . Which is probably , pretty obvious by now . Austin is like me in a way , only ....... he seems to enjoy being like this , being the one to help everyone else . I , on the other hand , hate it . I'm not a therapist, so if Austin wants to take on that role in everyone's lives he can be my guest .

Rose came back a little while later. She didn't mention Leahah, thank Merlin. We caught her up on everything that was going on with Quidditch and Austin being pretty much disowned by the Slytherins (as if that were a tragedy). Speaking of, we didn't come in contact with that charming little group of STD factories until we were getting into the carriages.

Rose, James and Wood were all going in a carriage with Leahah ( who had told Rose to meet her when we arrived , just as long as Al wasn't with her) . So Al, Hugo, Corbin and I started off on our own. Austin decided to come with us, even though I thought he'd hang with James and Wood.

We were literally walking and minding our own business (for once) and all of the sudden there was Nick Layndon, Brandon Arksly ,and Scorpius Malfoy.

"Well, well, well Bentley, we wondered where you'd gotten off to." Malfoy sneered. This surprised me a bit, I always assumed that Layndon would have been the one to take the Snake throne after his miserable excuse for a cousin managed to graduate.

See Nick Layndon is pretty much as two faced as a person could ever be. He has different personalities depending on who he's with. It's like he has this insane need to please everyone. Anyway Austin had been his best friend for years and now Layndon stood against him. All because Malfoy got the badge. Really, it is pathetic.

I never really concerned myself with Malfoy—he was kinda always just there. Rose used to despise him, and then as we got older he got less obnoxious. His problem is that he acts like everyone else is privileged to be in his presence which, judging by the looks my family was giving him right now, was not a true statement.

And Brandon , well he was like Malfoy's little servant . I kinda felt bad for him actually , or at least I would if he wasn't such an asshole,

"Wow Al" Corbin said. "We out number them and the cowards still had the guts to come over here and run their mouths."

" Ashley, you'd think you would've learned by now that we're not afraid of you."

" Well actually," Austin said pushing my shoulder lightly so he could stand in front of me to get closer to his former friends. "I know for a fact that Layndon's afraid of Wood."

" Oh yeah," Al said. "He pretty much knocked the eyeballs out of your sockets didn't he? I remember that now…"

"Well then he should be afraid of Rose too, because I'm pretty sure she annihilated him as well," Hugo said.

It was obvious that this was headed in a bad direction. Scorpius was already fingering his wand and the smirk had long disappeared from Layndon's face . Brandon just stood there like an oaf.

"Your face has healed up, mate, doesn't look anymore deformed then usual," Corbin added.

"Are you assholes done?" Layndon finally asked.

" That depends," Al said "Why exactly are you here?"

Personally I think that's rather obvious .

"Where's Rose?" Layndon asked.

"Why?" Austin demanded.

"Because I need to talk to her, otherwise believe me I would have nothing to do with you pathetic losers."

I sighed loudly, this argument was going no where.

"Let's go carriages are waiting," I said, pushing the boys away from the snakes.

"Fine, but uh Layndon," Austin said. "I'd recommend staying away from Rose. Wood would like nothing better then to rip your head off."

"Hah!" Layndon snorted. " I'd like to see him try."

"Alright enough," I said. I pushed at my lot again until I was sure that they were all focused on walking away (albeit reluctantly ).

"We have to find Wood!" Hugo said as he climbed into our carriage behind me.

"No we don't," I said. "It wasn't a big deal—it can wait until we get to the castle."

"But..."

"Hugh, if you tell him now when there aren't any teachers around, you'll be staring at those thestrals for the rest of your Hogwarts experience."

I guess I got my point across, because the ride to the castle was pretty silent. And they all didn't run into the great hall to tattle to Wood the second we pulled up. See that's what makes my family almost worse then the Slytherins. They absolutely thrive off of drama and if there isn't any naturally, they create it. Just like what they're going to do tonight. If they weren't all assholes, they would just pretend like it never happened and move on. But who am I to expect any of them to take the high road?

The worst part about this whole ordeal is that Austin can't sit with us at the feast, so that means the story is coming from Corbin, Al, and Hugo. I'm willing to bet they'll throw in a respective number of explosions, flamethrowers and ninjas. And of course James and Wood will believe whatever they say beyond a shadow of a doubt, because they are that desperate for confrontation.

Leahah wasn't anywhere to be seen once we sat down. It didn't surprise me, but Al looked a little disappointed. I am steadily becoming more and more annoyed with that girl. I managed to force the boys to keep a lid on it until after the sorting. That was when it all went to hell.

"We talked to Layndon," Al said.

Here we go . I decided that I wouldn't interlude unless they got really out of hand . Rose would be able to handle James and Wood ............ hopefully

" What!" Wood exclaimed, almost choking. "When?"

"It doesn't matter," Rose said. "Because your not going to acknowledge him_ remember_?"

"Yeah, sure whatever," James said, waving his hand towards her. "So what did he say?"

So Al told the story sans the explosions, thank Merlin. And shockingly everything was fine. Jordan and James didn't seem upset at all.

This was suspicious.

Then they were quiet for most of the meal.

Even more suspicious .

Next thing I know , James and Jordan are gone .

And uh-oh.

So is Layndon.

Hmm…

"Uh Rose," I said.

She looked at me, then at the empty seat next to her, and then at the door .

"No," she said (but I think she was talking to herself). "I trust him. He told me he wasn't gonna start anything, so—"

"Uh Rose," Hugo said.

Sure enough there was a group of losers standing in a circle in the entrance hall, making it quite obvious what was going on. You know the ones that stand there and chant "fight, fight, fight." And then run like girls when a teacher shows up.

Rose literally took off like a racehorse—I mean she's totally a crap athlete but she was hauling arse. When I finally got there, James was trying desperately to reason with Rose. While her boyfriend stood toe to toe with Layndon.

Now people I am a bit...vertically challenged. So I'm not going to pretend like I had any idea what was going on, because there were so many people.

I did see Wood finally snap, though. Layndon had said something—it sounded like he was making another ridiculous fat joke about Rose—only this time he was implying that Wood had knocked her up. The then words "_hit her and run_" and "_like father like son_" were uttered, and suddenly Layndon was up against the wall with Wood's wand to his throat.

I wish I could tell you that this story had a happy ending and Layndon's funeral was next week. But alas I can't…at least not yet .

See Wood is actually trustworthy. After mumbling a few convincing threats (that were probably more along the lines of promises) Wood backed down, and Layndon scurried away like a lab rat.

The crowd however did not disperse because the only thing they like better then a duel or sloppy fist fight, is a public breakup.

Okay so Rose and Wood didn't exactly break up.

But the Gryffindor common room was serenaded with the delightful sounds of Rose Weasley screeching at the top of her lungs and her boyfriend doing his absolute best to be just as loud.

The last things I heard for them before they stormed off were:

"How the hell do you expect me to trust you when you can't even do something so simple!"

"What about this is simple Rose. It's not like he's not some random kid that I'm bullying!"

I DON'T CARE! I ASKED YOU NOT TO DO ANYTHING "

"AND I DIDN'T REALLY DO ANYTHING!"

" OH BULLSHIT!"

"MAYBE YOU'RE JUST HAVING A HARD TIME FACING THE FACT THAT WHAT YOU WANT ISN'T AWAYS BEST. I KNOW YOU ROSE, AND I KNOW WHATS BEST FOR YOU! SO CHILL!"

"OH YOU KNOW WHATS BEST FOR ME, DO YOU? WELL, WHATS BEST FOR ME RIGHT NOW IS TO BE AS FAR AWAY FROM YOU AS POSSIBLE!"

"FINE, LEAVE, BE MY FREAKING GUEST!"

"GO TO HELL!"

"OH THAT'S GREAT, HOW BLOODY ORIGINAL!"

Then she slammed her dormitory door, and he slammed his.

This was the first real fight I've heard them have since they got together. And over Layndon? What is up with that? I mean, yeah, he did embarrass her a bit I suppose, but he was doing it FOR her not TO her. Rose just doesn't get things sometimes. Hence why it took three years for them to get together in the first place.

Anyway, Merlin knows how long this little tussle is going go on. They didn't break up and frankly I don't see that happening anytime soon, so one will apologize eventually. Even I have to get involved.

But on the bright side I have classes tomorrow!

Wooo freaking whooooo!!!!

I told you this year was going to suck.

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**Kso this was a long one....**

**i just wanted to say tht im writing a little bit slower then usual , soooooo these chapters may not come out as fast as Anyone but me did..... I am doing my best , i swear!**

**thnx**

**review???**


	3. Our Footsteps Wash Away

**Sorry for taking so long to update**

**this story is coming along albeit slowly .... its a little harder to write Lily , cause I feel like she's always contradicting herself , not sure maybe that's where im going with her character. Idk , but i really want to thank my beta Tesco Metro for helping me out with this mess of a chapter , i imagine correcting my grammer can get pretty frustrating .**

**SOOOO anyway , i know its been a while and im sure none of you are really happy with me ...**

**but thanks for sticking with the story**

**:)**

**_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________**

"Rose, can you pass me the butter?" Wood asked, solemnly. leaning across the table towards his girlfriend.

"Hm, I don't know if I trust you with this butter. After all, it's my favorite spread…Promise you wont drop it?" she asked raising her eyebrows innocently.

"Yes." He said , trying not to sound annoyed.

"Sorry, don't know if I can trust you." She smirked and pushed the butter further down the table.

Wood just rolled his eyes and shook his head .

I think that brings the score to Rose, 7—Wood, 3.

Yeah, I've been keeping score.

There wasn't much to do this week. I have boring classes, where I sat next to losers who are pretty much too intimidated by me being a Potter to so much as look at me. So yes, watching Rose and Jordan fight amuses the hell out of me.

I'm debating whether I should write a book about them.

See, the day after their fight they totally stayed away from each other and wouldn't say a word to anyone, basically sulking around like two giant 5 year olds. The next day they were bitching to everyone else about one and other. Then they spent the next two days refusing to even look at each other, let alone communicate. They instead tried to convince everyone else to be their go-betweens. It worked out real well. Rose almost punched Hugo and Leahah basically cussed Jordan out. Yesterday was when they progressed to this: sitting next to each other, walking with each other, and even talking to each other. Only the talking is more like _see who make the other one crack faster_. And as you can clearly see Rose is winning, mostly because she's more vengeful and clever than Jordan.

Hell hath no fury like a women scorned, after all.

"Well then," Wood said. "I could go over an ask Layndon to borrow some. Then I'll have the chance to get on my knees and beg him for forgiveness , that's what you want right ?"

"Yes, well, you may say you're going over to apologize, but next thing I know you'll have your wand to his throat. "Rose said , refusing to look him in the face, which only seemed to make him angrier .

"I'm starting to get really annoyed with your whole defending Layndon thing." Wood hissed, narrowing his eyes and slamming his fork down.

"We're all starting to get annoyed by both of you! Kindly stuff it so I can enjoy my bacon in peace," James fumed .

"Bacon clogs your arteries, James. Its nothing but greasy fat," I said. I've tried to be a vegetarian for a while now—I have very mixed feelings about meat. I really don't think it's fair to murder innocent animals for our own pleasure, but then again I am a Weasley . Meat is meat , and frankly it's not a meal without it .

James glared at me and dropped the piece he had been about to eat. "Thank you Lily," he mocked "You have a way of making things sound so appetizing."

"She has a point James," Wood said "Tryouts are Saturday, you gotta start eating better so you'll be in shape."

We all raised our eyebrows at him as he crammed a whole sausage in his mouth. Hypocrite.

"You're kidding, right?" Rose asked, frowning down at his ridiculously full plate. It was basically every meat on the table , piled over eggs and covered in ketchup. I've never understood Wood's eating habits.

He looked at her for a second and smiled.

"Oh, I'm sorry Rosie, was I too mean about that? You want me to apologize? No better yet, I'll go give him a hug."

"What?" James gasped, staring at his friend. "No."

"Let me hug you, James, so as to show Rosie that I'm not insensitive and violent ."

"No! Jordan don't hug me."James yelled as Jordan turned towards him "DON'T hug me! Rose, tell him not hug me. TELL HIM NOT TO HUG ME!"

"Do you really think that being a drama queen is going to help you win this battle, Wood?" Rose said, smiling sadistically at him.

"I know you of all people didn't just call him a drama queen," Corbin said, as he and Al came and sat at the table.

"Where were you guys?" James asked, dusting his robes off from when Wood had assaulted him with a very awkward , and obviously undesired _man hug_.

"Couples therapy," Corbin said and Al glared at him.

Yes, Al and Leahah partake in makeshift couple's therapy sessions. A combined effort of Austin and Corbin , the only two people in our group with enough patience to deal with the twats. It's ironic how Austin the slytherin is now the therapist to us Gryffindors, he seems to enjoy helping Al and Leahah. Corbin doesn't , but he's good at keeping Al calm , especially around his on and off girlfriend. They asked me to be involved, but I laughed in their faces. There was no way the Al /Leahah thing was going to end well and I wanted to be nothing more then an innocent bystander. It was stupid anyway , all they did was sit in the room of requirement and listen to them yell back and forth .I honestly don't know neither Austin nor Corbin have gone totally mad .

"Things any better?" Wood asked.

"Nope. Every time we try to ask Leahah a question she either answers it with another question or comes out with some kind of philosophical feminist rambling," Corbin said.

"I'm about ready to just give up," Al sighed.

"Good," I said. "It's not worth it Al."

"You don't know that," he mumbled .

I rolled my eyes and stood up. I was going to leave early for charms so I could choose my seat and not end up next to that weird girl with the magenta and green streaks in her hair. Hugo thinks she's funny, because she names her fingers and has them act out puppet shows. Maybe I'm being judgmental, but that is not funny, it's borderline psychotic. And I will not be put through another year of that !

"Oh, Lily!" Wood called before I got too far away. I noticed James, Al, and Corbin shaking their heads, so I pretty much knew whatever was coming was gonna piss me off.

"Quidditch Tryouts are Saturday 10 am, sharp."

I stared at him. "Yeah, I know Wood. Doesn't change the fact that I'm not trying out…"

"Oh, well, actually you are. I signed you up yesterday morning."

"You WHAT?" I demanded.

"Jordan!" Rose exclaimed, glaring at him.

"I signed you up, so I expect you to be there." he said stubbornly.

"Why would I want to try out to be a beater? I suck!" I exclaimed .

Seriously I've been playing quidditch since I was about 5, but beater is the one position that I am absolute rubbish at.

"You don't suck Lils, you're an amazing flyer," James said.

"Yes, flyer. Not beater!"

"If you expect to take me or James's place next year, you're gonna have to step up this year. I know you can do it Lily otherwise I wouldn't have put you on the list."

I tried not to be complimented by what he said, but when the quidditch prodigy deems you worthy of taking his place, you tend to be flattered.

"I hate you right now," I said, turning my back to him and storming away.

"Doesn't everyone?" I heard him mutter. I imagine he looked at Rose when he said this. Probably with one of those puppy dog eye deals, trying to guilt her into forgiving him. HAH good luck with that one, Jordy.

Rose doesn't just _loose_ arguments. It takes a lot to beat her out. She is the master of having the last word and the guru of getting her way.

Clearly, I am not—despite what my brothers may tell you. Little Lily Luna Potter isn't as spoiled as everyone would like to think.

This is why Saturday morning at 10 am sharp I found myself standing on the pitch, taking my frustrations out on whomever I could find.

"Good luck Lily," Hugo said, beaming as he walked past me.

"I don't need luck. I'm not trying out!" I snapped .

He looked at me funny. "But…you have your broom."

"Well...that doesn't mean I'm trying out, Hugo. _Honestly_, what's the big deal? What if I just enjoy carrying my broom around? Huh? Like when you were a kid and you carried around that stupid stuffed Dragon named Pixie! You went everywhere with that until you were ten, and did I say anything? NO!"

He looked around in a panic and to see if anyone had heard me.

"And you know what? I wouldn't even have to consider being here if Wood hadn't signed me up in the first place. He's the quidditch Capitan NOT MY MOTHER! So who the hell is he to make me do this?"

"I thought you...weren't...doing this ?" Hugo asked nervously.

I glared at him. "I'm NOT doing this. In fact, the reason I brought my broom is to symbolically cripple Wood with it so he will never again exert his autocratic quidditch powers on the innocent!"

"Uh, Lily? I'd really appreciate it if you refrained from '_symbolically crippling'_ my boyfriend," Rose said as she and Leahah walked over to us. Apparently they decided that the perfect way to spend their Saturday was supporting their boyfriends , even though they weren't speaking to them.

"Oh, you'll acknowledge him as your boyfriend now? Is that because he's not around?" I raised my eyebrows at her and she rolled her eyes.

"You just enjoy trying out," She said.

"You know what? You're probably the reason I'm in this mess!" I yelled at her. "Wood's all sexually frustrated so he's taking it out on _me_."

"Look, Lily," Rose said calmly "I understand that you're nervous—"

"I am NOT nervous," I interrupted.

"You look a little nervous," Hugo added. I glared at him , because no one tells me when I am or am not nervous . I wasn't nervous I was anxious, it's different . Anxious being the less pathetic of the two.

"NO!" I hissed at them.

"You'd better hurry, Lily, Wood's splitting everyone into groups," Leahah said.

"It doesn't matter because I am NOT trying out."

I turned around, took a deep breath, and walked over towards the idiots Wood was shouting at. I say idiots because most of them looked like they had never even been on a quidditch pitch in their lives.

"Good Luck Lily!" Rose shouted at my back. I ignored her and waited for her asshole boyfriend's directions.

"Ah, Lily!" He said. "Glad you showed up."

"Go Die," I said simply.

"Just get in that group of three over there and fly a lap. Nothing difficult," he said , ignoring my hositilty and total disrespect for his authority . "Oh and Lily, Good luck!"

"D. I. E." I spelled, trying to be menacing and not look pathetically nervous.

The lap was easy enough. At least for me it was, there were quite a few people struggling with getting their broom into the air.

That made me feel a bit better.

Then we had to actually hit a bludger. Wood asked me to go first, along with a fifth year boy I'd never met. He was decent looking , kind of stocky with auburn hair and a rather weird shaped head . Not really memorable though , just one of those kids who seems to blend in with the walls .

It felt like every person on the pitch was starring at me. I hate that feeling because normally I don't draw all that much attention to myself. At least not when I think I'm going to mess up

"Wood," I said, just before he had Hugo release the bludgers. "Do I really have to do this?"

He looked at me for a second. "No, but you want to. That's why you're up here. Plus you get a free shot at your brother and I. Just hit it the best you can."

He flew off and I felt surprisingly better. The kid next to me didn't look nervous at all, he just kinda sat there.

"Ready?" Wood yelled. "Let em' go Hugh!"

It didn't go well.

I missed it the first two times it came at me, the third I managed to swipe it, but it didn't go far. I looked pretty pathetic especially because that kid next to me was…well, amazing would be a good word. Not only was he hitting the bludgers every time, but without fail and with excellent precision. He was flying circles around me. I mean I'm a pretty fair flyer, and this kid was making me look like a three year old on a toy broom.

"Alright!" Wood yelled. "Next pair!"

I flew down to the stands, thankful that it was over.

"You did good, Lil," Hugo said.

"Don't lie." I snapped

"No, really. I mean, you were nothing on that kid but…"

"Yeah, who is _he_?" I asked.

"I don't know, but Wood seemed pretty impressed."

I decided to wait out the rest of the tryouts with Hugo instead of climbing the stands to sit with Rose who was talking to Leahah.

It took about an hour to get through all the pairs. And then another hour for the few people who decided to tryout against the returning team to make their attempt . Of course none of the guys lost their spots so all Wood had to do was chose his beaters .

"Alright guys, just give me about ten minutes and I'll let you know who's got it." Wood said addressing everyone that was standing around.

I knew I didn't make it. I knew the kid that had tried out with me did and I knew that even though I never expected to make it I was still a little disappointed.

"I'm proud of you Lil," James said, as he an Al walked over to me.

"Thanks," I said.

"Uh, has Rose said anything…?"

"No, James, Rose hasn't said anything to me about Wood. Why couldn't he just come ask me himself?" I asked, rolling my eyes.

"Because he said that last week you told him if he asked you one more time you'd hex him."

"He's gonna have to apologize to Layndon if he wants Rose to forgive him." I said.

"He's not going to apologize to Layndon." Al said.

"Yeah, and he shouldn't have to. She being totally ridiculous about all this," James added.

"Look, you guys would do well to stay out of their business. You have a tendency to make it worse," I said, sitting down on the ground and looking up at them.

"No, _James_ has a tendency to make it worse," Al protested.

"Hey, at least _I'm _not in couples therapy."

"Well, you couldn't be could you? Because YOU don't have a girlfriend."

"Gee, Al you're so clever. Why don't you—"

"Oh will you two stuff it," I interjected, sensing a fight approaching. "Wood's coming back."

"Alright," he said loudly. "There were two vacant spots on the team. You all did the best you could and I really appreciate it. However, we're gonna go with Decklin Krueger and Kareana Taylor."

I heard some people around me groan and couldn't help but feel a bit let down.

The mystery boy that had tried out with me was Decklin. I'd never really noticed him before ,but he sure as hell looked promising. Though, he didn't look really thrilled he was just kind of standing there.

The Kareana girl on the other hand looked very excited. She gave some people a high five and was smiling. She had been good—she was fast, had good reflexes, and had a brilliant swing. Her and Decklin's personalities seemed to be completely opposite and I wondered how that was going to work on the pitch.

Slowly people started leaving the pitch. I hung around because I wanted everyone to know that I wasn't all that torn up about not making it, even though I kinda was . Plus I was interested in these two new additions.

"Alright," Wood said, now that it was just the team on the pitch and only a few random people in the stands. "So Kareana and Decklin, welcome to the team. You guys totally blew the competition away. No offense Lily," he added as I walked behind him towards the stands.

"I just wanted you guys to fly around with each other a bit, get used to the team. We have the pitch for another half hour so go on and do that and afterwards we'll discuss the boring stuff."

Everyone nodded and turned around to grab their brooms. I noticed Kareana was already talking to James as if she had known him her whole life. Decklin was quiet, he just grabbed his broom and took off.

"Hey, Lily, can I talk to you?" Wood asked.

"As long as it's not about Rose," I said, wearily.

"It's not…but is she still, uh, is she still here?"

I sighed and looked over his shoulder. Rose was still in the stands, talking to Leahah who was stretched out looking extremely bored.

"Yes, she's still here," I said, rolling my eyes.

He nodded as if he didn't care and continued with whatever he was saying before. "I was impressed with you today."

"Wood, don't try to—"

"I'm being serious. You adapted very quickly up there. That's a major part of quidditch. You took your skills and applied them to your position, hence why you didn't get knocked off your broom."

"Yeah, but I'm not a beater."

"But you could learn."

I raised my eyebrows at him. "What does that mean?"

"I want you to be our reserve."

"What?" I asked, gaping at him. I've been at this school for 4 years and I never remembered there being a " _reserve_".

"I know we don't usually designate a technical reserve, but this year we are. I want you to practice with the team in case one of us gets hurt or something."

I just continued to stare at him.

"Plus, it'll help next year. You're the future of the team, Potter—they're gonna need you next year. So now you can prepare."

"Are you serious?" I asked.

He stared at me. "Why would I joke about that? It wouldn't be funny and you'd probably hex the crap outta me."

"Yes, well, I was just making sure."

"So you'll do it?"

I smiled at him. "Yeah, I'll do it."

"Great."

He then clapped me on the back and walked away like it was no big deal.

Wood, come on! It was a huge deal!

I mean even though I totally sucked, Wood still thought I was good enough to take his place next year. PLUS, I get to practice with them!

It's amazing!

I get the feeling I shouldn't be as excited about it as I am.

So seeing as I was desperate to hear some praise ,I took of towards the stands where my darling cousin was.

"Rose!" I yelled. "I made reserve."

"You made what?" She yelled back.

"Reserve! I get to practice with them and play if one of them got hurt."

"Oh, that's—"

Suddenly, Rose was interrupted by James screaming (in the girly way he tends to scream). The loud crash that followed said scream, signaled to me that someone had just gotten laid out by one of our new beaters. And after Rose jumped up from her seat, I knew exactly who it was.

"Wood!" I heard everyone yell as they ran towards where he was on the ground.

Rose practically threw me out of the way to get to him.

"Jordan!" she yelled, kneeling next to him. "Jordan?"

Thankfully he wasn't unconscious. He looked dizzy, though, as he sat up and looked around.

"Rose?" He said "What are you doing down here?"

"I got nervous when you fall off your broom and don''t get up," She said, looking genuinely terrified.

"Yeah mate, remember last year? We don't want to go through that again," Al said.

See, the last match last year was against Slytherin. Nick Layndon who was still Rose's boyfriend at the time, decided to pull a cheap shot and knock Wood off his broom. Well, it ended up being a lot more serious then Layndon had intended it to be. Wood was in the hospital for two weeks. It was one of the scariest things I've ever witnessed.

"I'm fine," he mumbled "Who hit that bludger?"

Everyone turned and looked at Decklin who raised his hand guiltily.

"Sorry sir," he said, quietly .

Well, I guess it's good that we know he can talk ,but what's up with the _sir_? Wood's a quidditch capitan , that's not exactly a position of authority worthy of a _sir. _

Wood laughed. "Don't apologize, that was a brilliant hit."

Decklin smiled. "Thank you."

"Are you okay, Jordan?" Rose asked.

"I'm fine. Everyone back in the air. We only have like fifteen minutes left."

The team nodded and went to retrieve their brooms. James and Corbin clapped Decklin on the back.

"Nice one, mate," Corbin said.

"Just don't hit us, save it for Slytherins yeah?" James asked.

From where I was standing, it looked like Decklin laughed before he took off. That seemed like a nice change.

"Hey, you're Lily Potter, right?"

I turned around and saw the girl that had been selected alongside Decklin. She was the first girl on the Gryffindor team since Abigail Masters graduated in my first year.

"Yeah," I said.

"I'm Kareana Taylor. Just wanted to make sure there were no hard feelings. You did good up there."

"No," I said, shaking the hand she had offered me. "No hard feelings. Thanks, though."

"Well, see you around."

And then she took off. It was strange to say the least, she felt like she had to be on good terms with me. She seemed sincere though, even if she was acting a bit cocky. I guess I'll be able to get along with her.

Hey, wait a minute, I'm reserve…should I be up there too?

"Hey Wood, should I be—"

I stopped when I realized that I was interrupting a "_moment_." And since I'm not at all like James, I was gracious enough to keep my mouth shut and pretend I wasn't there.

"Are you actually okay or are you just saying that?" Rose asked Wood, who was still laying on the ground.

"I'm fine, really. My shoulder just hurts a bit," he said, wincing as he sat up more.

"Where? Here?" She asked, pointing to a spot. He nodded and she bent down and kissed it.

"There."

"Thanks," he said nervously. "So, did you see? I didn't yell at Decklin, my temper isn't _that _bad."

"Jordan," Rose sighed, sitting flat on the ground next to him. "It wasn't what you said to Layndon that was the problem. I understand that he deserves what he gets, but I really just want to put all that behind me. And I cant do that if you keep letting him get a rise out of you."

"So…does that mean we're not fighting anymore?" He asked, sounding hopeful.

"No, we're not fighting anymore."

"So, can I kiss you or…?"

Rose shook her head and laughed. "Shut up," she said and then they kissed. It appeared that the fight was over, though I'm not entirely sure who won. Rose did tell him to shut up before she started snogging him so, I'm guessing that would mean…

"POTTER!"

Apparently the snogging was over.

"Yeah, Wood?"

"You're part of the team, get your ass in the air."

Well that answered my question.

I actually felt like a member of the team, even though I was really just a stand in. I mean, it wasn't a hard adjustment to make because I've been playing quidditch with James and Al and Jordan and Hugo my whole life. But now I was on the quidditch pitch and not just in the orchard at the burrow. It was sort of empowering and definitely an improvement.

But on the other hand , I sort of felt like a groupie at a rock concert that had one some kind of meet the band contest. The guys were different when they were on the pitch and I had never been apart of that. It was really weird sitting in the locker room listening to Wood and his "_Rules to Live and Die by_."

But I was still ecstatic. I wanted the whole school to know that I, Lily Potter, was deemed worthy by the great Jordan Wood to lead the team in upcoming years. But then again, I was only reserve. It didn't seem like it should be a lot to get excited over. Course, that didn't stop me from writing mum the second I got a chance.

"Alright Prongs," I said to James' owl. "Take this home as fast as you can. You've been slacking lately. I've never heard of an owl acting like its owner , but maybe you ought to stop spending time with James."

I watched him fly out the Owlery window and into the darkening sky. Mum would be excited, actually…maybe a little too excited. I hope she doesn't expect me to actually play…I hope I don't expect me to actually play. I mean it would be awesome, but it's not likely. I can't get my hopes up because really even if I do play, what happens if I suck? Then no one in this school will take me seriously.

"Why is it that something can seem so good one minute and then make you miserable the next?" I asked myself, not expecting an answer but receiving one from someone who had been standing behind me.

"Life's ridiculous like that," he said. "Plus people over think things."

"Merlin, Austin, you scared me," I said, turning around to see him smiling at me.

"Sorry," he said. "What's up Lily?"

"What, you mean why am I talking to myself and questioning life?"

"Ha-ha, yeah."

"Wood told me he wanted me to be a reserve for the team so I can prepare for next year. He said he thought I was the future of the team and that I could take his place." I turned my head to look at him, he was beaming .

"That is great Lily," he said. "Wood's not the type to designate reserves, you must have done amazing."

"Not really," I said. "He just wants to give me the chance to practice with the team, it's really not a big deal."

He looked at me for a second. " It definitely is. Don't underestimate this Lily, you have every reason to be happy about it."

"Yeah, but, what if I get out there and I suck. I mean, technically I'm not on the team, I can't expect Wood to help me…"

"Well, I'm free."

_Wait. _"What?"

"I'm not playing this year, remember? So if you ever need my help, I'd be more then happy to. That is, if you trust me, since I am a Slytherin and all." He laughed.

I stared at him. "Are you serious?"

"Of course."

I laughed. "Austin, I don't know how you do it, but you always make things better."

"Yeah I'm good like that," he said, with a laugh. "You heading down to dinner?"

"Oh, yeah."

"Okay, I'll walk with you."

I nodded and waited for him to tie his letter to a school owl. I could be happy about this, even if it technically wasn't a big deal.

Maybe this year wouldn't be so bad after all?


	4. It's Been Getting Late for Days

**Ok so im doing my besy to go quicker with the updates , but thankfully i do have alot of this story pre written.**

**I would really like to thank my beta _Tesco Metro_ for helping me with this even though she's going through a lot right now . **

**sooooo i hope you like this chapter better than the last one , which i know some of you were dissapointed in .**

**thanks for reading and please reveiw if you can **

**:)**

* * *

Have you ever hated anyone that you really didn't know, just because you had to hear someone whine about them 24-7?

This is how I feel about one Julie Drake, James's "summer fling." The girl obviously led the idiot on, I mean I know he has a big head, but he seems to be really crushed. Every other day he gets a letter from her, and _every time_ we (his loving family ) try to tell him not to open it. He never listens.

Today, Julie told him how Paolo was coming to visit her in a few weeks and she was really happy that they were making the long distance relationship work. I'm not sure why she thought James wanted to hear about that, maybe she's just dumb, or she enjoys messing him around. Either way my lunchtime this afternoon was interrupted by my two older brothers arguing over whose relationship situation was more pathetic.

"James, you two aren't together—you actually never were," Al said, rolling his eyes.

"Yeah, well, at least I'm not clinging to someone who flat out told me they wanted nothing to do with me anymore," James spat back.

"She took that back ok! She only said it in the heat of the moment!"

"Heat of the moment? Do you hear yourself? Do you hear the rubbish excuses you're buying off of her?"

"Least I'm not obsessing over someone hundreds of miles away, who's obviously in love with some Italian prince charming."

"No you're obsessing over someone who breaks up with you twice a week."

"We're working things out. You're pining for someone who's not even remotely in your reach."

"How the hell do you figure that?"

"She dating a guy named Paolo who takes her on shopping sprees and cooks for her. That's not easy to compete with in girl land."

"Yeah well, I have a better relationship with her, and then you do with your _supposed_ girlfriend."

"How is she my_ supposed_ girlfriend?"

"Ok," Rose interrupted. "I think that's enough from the both of you."

"Yeah I agree," I said defiantly "It's all getting pretty redundant, and it's definitely annoying."

"All I wanted was advice and I get a lecture from my little brother about how pathetic I am, sorry if I don't take that laying down." James slammed his fork down and stood up.

"James, calm down mate," Hugo urged.

James just shook his head and disappeared into the entrance hall.

"Should I go after him?" Al asked, looking slightly guilty.

"No." Hugo sighed "Just let him be. We'll tell Wood to check on him later."

"He's just gonna keep getting hurt," Rose muttered, grabbing Julie's letter and folding it up. "He should just stop talking to her."

"That's not the solution for everything," I said "Ignoring someone doesn't keep you from getting hurt—you should know that more than anyone."

She shot me a glare, but I didn't mind. She knew I was right. Even though it was a low blow to bring up her past mistakes with Jordan, I didn't want to see James get the point where she had once been.

"He doesn't really know this girl, eventually he'll see she's not worth it," I said.

"Lils, you can't automatically assume someone isn't worth it just because your relationship needs work. It usually doesn't come easy," Al countered.

"Well Al I guess it just depends on whether your willing to let someone break you or not," I replied icily.

"You know, you're really pessimistic," Hugo said, looking at me with concern.

"Yeah I know, and I'm almost never disappointed so it pays off."

That was a lie of course—it doesn't matter how much you try not to, you're always gonna get your hopes crushed at one time or another. Whether it's with a relationship, or a sport, or school. Pessimism doesn't save you from disappointment; it just makes it easier to deal with.

"Did James get another letter from Julie?"

We all turned around and saw Wood and Decklin Krueger (the new beater) heading towards us, brooms over their shoulders, dirt on their robe—pretty much the typical Saturday for these two: play quidditch until you get _a) _hungry or _b)_ kicked off the pitch.

"Yeah," Rose said, handing him the folded up note. "Al and him had a bit of a row..."

"We know we ran into him outside," Wood explained, reading the note to himself. " He was mumbling something about twitchy little brothers and Italian guys ."

"Is this the girl James has feelings for?" Decklin asked.

Two weeks on the team and I was still not used to hearing Decklin's voice. He was really quiet most of the time, but when he did speak it was with a very strong Irish accent. And he was always so proper too; he never used slang words, never spoke in broken sentences, and always said what was on his mind. It was unnatural.

He was a very odd boy, that much was obvious. He was very intelligent, and yet he never got anyone's jokes. It took almost a whole practice for Wood to explain to him that Kareana was talking about his "lucky charms" in reference to an old American cereal. I have a feeling that he's been made fun of a lot in his life, because ridicule never seems to bother him. Once he overheard Al telling Leahah how weird he was, Decklin just nodded, said "good evening," and walked away like nothing had happened.

I suppose I like him, I mean he's nice and all aside from the overall creepiness. Wood absolutely adores him; he treats him like a little brother. Rose says it's sweet, they're always together, and Decklin seems to look up to Wood.

I am starting to see an issue brewing in this happy little relationship though. Since Decklin is spending time with his new "big brother," Jordan, he's also been spending a lot of time with Rose. And I have noticed that Decklin has been acting very differently around my cousin lately. Maybe he and Wood have a lot more in common then we realize, if you know what I'm saying. But Wood is oblivious to it, as is Rose. Maybe I am imagining it, but I'm gonna keep an eye out, just in case.

"Why does she keep writing to him? Does she really think he needs to hear about this Paolo guy?" Wood said as he finished the letter.

"I don't know, but one more letter and James might be headed to Italy to get rid of said Paolo guy," Hugo added.

"He would never find him though, Paolo is a very popular name and we have no physical descriptions of him. So I doubt that we have anything to worry about," Decklin said, reaching down the table for a plate of sandwiches.

"He was kidding, Krueg," Wood said.

"Oh."

"Hey Wood," I said. "Is the pitch booked this afternoon?"

"Nope, but I have a Defense essay due so I'm done for the day. Why, you going out?" He asked.

"Probably, if Austin feels like going with me," I stated finishing off my sandwich.

"Oh yeah, Austin's been helping you huh?" Rose asked with a big smile. "That's awfully nice of him."

"Yeah well it's the only quidditch action he's getting this year," I said "I'm gonna go find him; I'll talk to you guys later."

And so I headed towards the very end of the slytherin table where Austin sat, when he didn't sit with us. He was talking to a 3rd year girl whose name was Katie, I think.

"Hey," I said, sitting down and interrupting their conversation.

"Hi," Austin chirped, "Lily this is Kelly, Kelly this is Lily."

"I know who she is," the girl snapped, giving me one of those challenging up and down glances.

"So," I said awkwardly. "The pitch is free, I was wondering if you wanted to go out."

"Oh yeah definitely," he smiled, standing up. "Look Kell, we'll talk later ok?"

The girl looked at him for a minute and then rolled her eyes. "Whatever," she huffed, turning away from us.

Austin didn't seem phased by her little tantrum, which kind of amused me, and instead pulled me out into the entrance hall.

"I'll get my broom and meet you down there, yeah?" he said, heading off towards the dungeons.

I nodded and made off to fetch my own broom. I wonder what was up with that little girl. Okay she wasn't little, but she's three years younger than him, so why the hell was he even bothering? Then again I'm two years younger than him, and he talks to me. But that's just because he's friends with my family.

I wonder if he's into that girl. I wouldn't care or anything, but I bet she wouldn't like me and him hanging out as much as we've been lately. She already looked like she wanted to claw my eyes out just from me talking to him. It's none of my business, though. I mean I couldn't care less who he dates or talks to, I just find them a really odd couple. That's all.

We both made it down to the pitch in about ten minutes and immediately started flying laps like we usually do. That was when curiosity got the best of me.

"Hey Aus," I said as we slowed to a halt. "Who was that girl this morning?"

He looked at me for a second. "Kelly?" he asked. "She's my cousin."

For some reason it felt like a weight had been lifted from my chest and I smiled at him. "I thought it was something like that."

"Yeah, she was in a bit of a strop."

"Why?"

"Her older sister has been missing for about three week's now," he said bluntly.

I looked at him. I was shocked, all we'd talked about and he hadn't mentioned that his cousin was missing.

"Oh Merlin, I'm so sorry," I gasped.

"Oh no, don't be. We're pretty sure she's okay—she's done this before. She has some drug problems. It's actually gotten so bad that she really can't do much magic anymore. It's really sad because she's only 18. Her dad died about three years ago and ever since then she's totally lost all regard for anyone but herself."

"That sounds rough," I said "How come you never talk about your family? I never knew you even had any in the school."

"Yeah, I have Kelly and her brother Trent—he's a first year. I try to keep my family life away from here; this is kind of my escape."

"Oh, I know what you mean. My family's business is usually out for the whole world to see, what with the papers and all. I really don't have anything to hide."

"It's not that I want to hide anything it's just…I don't need everyone to think less of me, you know."

"Austin, have you ever heard about Jordan's family? My family has dysfunction to, despite what everyone might think, we aren't perfect. You shouldn't feel like you have to hide who you are. I mean, James embarrasses me everyday, but I'd never try to pretend I wasn't related to him."

He sighed and looked at me "Alright, Lily Potter, allow me to define family dysfunction for you."

I smiled and sat down on one of the benches, waiting for him to begin his story.

"My mom's mom was born in France, she forced my mom and her sister to be in little miss witch pageants, model for magazines, whatever she could do to get their names in print. My mom said she did it because she was hoping that her husband, my grandfather, would come back to her if he saw how successful his kids were. That didn't happen, but grandma did succeed in turning my Aunt Elise into the biggest spoiled brat the world has ever seen. "

I laughed at the look on Austin's face as he said his Aunts name . It was kinda like the one James got anytime someone brought up my cousin Lawrence .

"When they moved to England, that was when they met my dad. He lived down the street from them; there wasn't really a lot of dysfunction with his family, unless you count the fact that they were all death eaters. My dad got the mark when he was 17, which was around the time that he and my mom started dating. Well my mom ended up pregnant, so they got married, even though I'm pretty sure they would have later anyway. My brother Aiden was born. That was when my Aunt Elise decided to act up ."

He started pacing back and forth as he told the story , almost nervously . I guess he really was afraid of what I would think of him .

"She was 2 years older than my mom" he continued "19 and single, she hated the fact that my mom had a family and she didn't. So she started dating my dad's best friend Robert Layndon, Nick's dad. I was born about a year and a half after Aiden; by that time Elise had dumped Robert and was just like, dating random guys I guess. Anyway what ended up happening was, my mom came home form a doctors appointment with me and Aiden and found my dad sleeping with Elise. So of course they split up, and my mom hasn't talked to Elise since. My dad refuses speak to anyone on my mom's side of the family, because after it happened Elise tried to press charges against him saying he had sexually assaulted her. Luckily the charges didn't stick. My dad lived with Robert Layndon till I was 5, and then moved in with his brother Chad. That's Kelly's dad, the one that died three years ago."

It felt like he was reading me the story line of a soap opera. It literally astounded me that someone as cool and laid back as Austin was raised in the midst of all that chaos and drama.

" I lived with my mom in France until I got my Hogwarts letter, then I came to live with dad because my mom decided that she wanted to date a 20 year old named Lothario. I haven't heard from her in almost a year. Aiden won't live with my dad, because of what he did, and the whole death eater thing, he stays with his friend in Whales. I've learned to accept the fact that my dad is pretty much an asshole. I'm just gonna do my hardest not to be like him, like any of them for that matter."

  I looked at him. He didn't seem sad, just disappointed. It was obvious that he had in fact accepted it, but I could tell he was worried to see my reaction, as if I would judge him because of how his parents had acted.

"Austin, you're not like them at all," I said "Standing up to Layndon last year proved that beyond a shadow of a doubt."

"You know Lily," he smiled, plopping down on the bench next to me. "You're pretty good at the making everything better thing, too."

I smiled, and everything was peaceful, until the moment had to be ruined.

"Well I wasn't expecting this," we heard someone hiss from behind us.

Of course the Slytherins would choose this moment to appear.

"What are you trying to hook up with Potter now, Bentley?" Malfoy asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Pretty sure it's none of your business," Austin replied.

"To good to gossip with your old Slytherin buddies? You've been hanging with that Gryffindor scum so long, your head seems to have expanded ten fold."

"Why, because he stood up to you?" I said. "Sometimes, Malfoy, I think you forget that you're a nobody."

"And Sometimes, Potter, I think you forget that a last name doesn't give you position over everyone else."

"Ok, you know what," Austin interrupted, pulling me up by the shoulder. "We're leaving."

"Not so fast," Layndon snapped, speaking for the first time. "I need to talk to Potter."

"About what?" I asked.

"Rose," he replied simply.

"Rose? You wanna talk about Rose? Ok well let me just start by telling you that you need to stay far away from her, that's for your own safety. Next, allow me to burst whatever bubble you've been living in. Rose didn't love you, she doesn't now, and she never will. She loves Jordan."

"Potter, you think you know all about us, but you don't know anything."

"Oh, I don't! I know that you took advantage of her to impress your friends; I know that you sacrificed her feelings for your reputation, and you know what the worst part about that is? I believe that you may have really liked her Layndon.

"I do, and the fact that you let your cousin and all these idiots come before a girl you really cared about is pathetic. You should have just manned up and admitted that you actually cared about her, but instead you had to make yourself into a player so all the Slytherins would think you were cool.

'I know all about you and Rose, and I also know that there's nothing to talk about, because that relationship is so unbelievably over that you have a better chance of resurrecting Voldemort from the grave then getting her back." I took a deep breath and looked at him, he was fuming.

"Watch me, Potter, you little smart ass, you just watch me." And with that, he stormed off the pitched, leaving Scorpius behind him.

"Wow Potter, didn't know you had it in you," he mused.

I rolled my eyes as Austin started pushing me towards the locker rooms.

"Ignore him," he whispered.

"I'll see you around Bentley, you too, love," Malfoy crooned, winking at me.

I wanted to pop his eye out of its socket, the vile little parasite, but Austin made me keep walking.

"I'm sorry about that," he said, once we were safely away from the assholes.

"Don't worry about it," I smiled. "I've been waiting to tell Layndon off for months."

"Yeah, but Malfoy..."

"Malfoy is scum, he can suck it, and I don't care what he thinks."

He smiled at me.

"So what do you say we go tattle to Wood?" I asked.

He laughed, "You think Layndon got enough of a head start?"

"Who cares, he's a whiney little pouf, and he deserves a bit more abuse. Maybe it'll finally click how dumb he's being and his head will deflate, if not…one less Slytherin in the world."


	5. A Little Time Off

_i know this took a really long time_

_dont hate me i swear im trying , I've got another 3 chapters of this written out , and im trying to work on a opp Rosewood story ._

_But i do have a heavy workload at school , Ap classes , newspaper , literary magazine , and i have practice ._

_Soo please dotn lose faith in me , upates will come , just a bit slow _

_Ill do my best to be quicker , promiseee_

* * *

I am beginning to notice a pattern.

It seems that I have lost the ability to enjoy _anything_.

I know, I know, "Why so sad?"

But I'm being serious here. Everything about this year is so boring, so vanilla, that things I used to look forward to really don't do much for me. Quidditch hasn't even spiced things up all that much. I mean, it's fun and all—I get to hang out with Austin—but being reserve is just kind of blah.

I don't know, maybe it's just a phase. I could wake up tomorrow absolutely glowing with love for my wonderful life. But right now I just feel like I could be doing so much more with it, even though I'm not sure exactly what that is.

I have bigger problems to deal with right now though.

See ,the first Hogsmeade trip is upon us.

And the castle is absolutely buzzing with ridiculous gossip and excitement. The village is nice and it's always been fun. Of course, it's significantly more enjoyable if you actually have a date, which you know I don't. I think this boy Brian Goldstein was going to ask me, but then I saw him snogging Bethany Leap.

Rose once told me I'm too unapproachable. Like maybe if I loosened up and snogged a few random guys people wouldn't label me as an ice bitch, which I know they do. I mean, I'm pretty isolated. I spend most of my time with my family or their friends . Of course a have friends of my own, people I talk to in classes or in my dorm, but I still feel isolated.

Rose has Leahah, Al has Corbin, James has Wood, and Fred had Grizz. I have Hugo, and I love him to death, but sometimes I wonder why I never made a friend like they all did with someone outside the family that I could talk to and laugh with. I can't be that horrible, right? People like me well enough, at least to my face. The entire wizarding world sees me as Harry Potter's baby daughter, they always have. And it never really bothered me until now. Maybe it's just this "phase" I'm going through.

Anyway, my overall point is that I am dateless and friendless for Hogsmeade.

Even Hugo's got a date.

Kareana Taylor, you know the new beater (the female/normal one). She was whining the other day at practice about being alone in the village, and Hugo (who had been whining about the same thing that morning in charms) actually gathered the nerve to ask her out, and she said yes.

We were all pretty shocked; I mean what an unlikely pair that is.

Hugo is calm and timid. He rarely ever speaks his mind and usually tries to keep a low head. Kareana never shuts up (I mean that in the nicest way possible). She has an opinion on everything and could care less if you agree with her.

Hugo hasn't had a girlfriend since second year. He snogged her once and that's the furthest he's gone with a girl. The other day Kareana went on an hour long rant about her "sexcapades."

Hugo has told me before that he doesn't like dating random people meaning he'd only ask someone out if he sincerely liked them meaning that this is going to be a problem because Kareana just recently got out of a pretty serious relationship with some guy named Vince who graduated last year. When she brought this up to me, she told me that she wasn't over him, never would be, and no guy at Hogwarts could ever live up to him. And the next day she agreed to go out with my cousin.

Hopefully you can see why I am less then amused at this little arrangement. Wood was pretty pissed too saying he didn't approve of teammates dating. Hugo then reminded him that he didn't approve of him snogging his sister and could easily drop Uncle Ron a line and that shut our dear Capitan up real quickly.

The best part about this is that that those two aren't even the most shocking news. No, Al and Leahah decided to make amends (again) and spend the day together, alone. Better man the storm shelter, because I don't see this going good. I think Leahah agreed to go out of desperation but Al is extremely optimistic. Either way we have all begged Corbin to keep an eye on them in the village (even though he has a date of his own), because like every other day with Leahah and Al, one little thing could send them at each other's throats. For instance yesterday at dinner Al told Leahah that she had some tomato sauce on her face , this simple attempt at common courtesy turned into an hour long argument about how Al is "obviously only using her to flaunt around as his girlfriend , since he's so worried about her not looking her best an embarrassing him."

Al's response to this was to tell her that she's turning into her step-mum (who is pretty much the Voldemort to Leahah's Harry Potter ) . Leahah then preceded to dump the sauce onto Al , and he spent the rest of the evening being treated for first degree burns.

These two are planning on spending an ENTIRE day together .

HaHa!

And, even better then _that_ inevitable disaster is the one James has decided to unleash on us all. Yup, he's finally cracked and decided that he can't wait for Julie any longer. We were all pretty proud of him when he told us. I was getting a little sick of watching this girl, hundreds of miles away, mess around with him so much.

Then I met his new "girlfriend," Cassandra Becket, or as I like to refer to her _Bubbles_, and wasn't so proud anymore. This girl is literally always smiling. And not a nice, friendly smile, _no_. It's one of those perky, giggly,_ "life's wonderful and so am" I_ smiles that make you want to smack the person in the face. Her only worries in the world are her daily outfits and her kittens. Yeah, she has a cat fetish. Isn't that absolutely _smashing?_

In fact the first time I spoke to her she told me I reminded her of her youngest kitten "Sparkles." I don't think I have ever been so offended by the word "sparkles" in my life. It took everything I had to walk away and not throttle her.

Then, she started trying to give relationship advice telling Rose that Wood didn't seem nearly as committed to their relationship as James did to his own. She chose to say this while in the presence of Wood, who looked nothing short of murderous. Decklin, however, decided to critique the giggly little priss-bag's grammar (which he sometimes does) and that actually seemed to offend her a little bit. It provided a distraction so Wood could keep calm.

The point of all this is to show that, basically, for the first time ever, I am completely alone.

And even though everyone offered to hang out with me, I hate being the 3rd wheel especially with all these particular couples. Kareana and Hugo (awkward), Al and Leahah (disastrous), James and Bubbles (I'd rather die) , Corbin and…whatever his dates name is (boring) and Rose and Wood (well I see enough of those two being sappy as it is).

And so I made my way down to the great hall that morning, not even sure if I was going to go to the village at all.

"Good morning, Lily."

I looked up and saw Austin walking towards me.

"Still no plans today?" he asked.

I shook my head. "Not at all."

"Me either," he sighed. "All I have to do is send yet another letter to Annalisa—"

"Oh, that girl that lives in America?" I asked, smiling as we sat down at the Gryffindor table.

He snorted "That's the one."

"She sent you another letter?" I inquired, having a bit more interest in the situation then I probably should have.

"She sends me one about once every two weeks," he explained. "For the last…three years."

"So are you guys like, together or—"

"No!" he exclaimed "No, no, _no_. We dated for about two months my 3rd year, then her family moved to America. And when she heard they were leaving she tried to convince me to marry her, which, being a thirteen year old boy, I found quite disturbing. She obviously hasn't gotten the hint after about 30 letters explaining to her that she didn't need to "_wait for me_" because I wasn't her "_soul mate_." Hasn't worked yet, but who knows? Maybe this one will do charm." He waved a letter in front of his face and I began to laugh.

"Glad you find this funny Potter." He smiled. "Guess you've never experienced a stalker—"

"Oh, she has," James interrupted as he and Bubbles sat down across from us. "About two summers ago, Al and I had to chase some boy out of our front yard at three in the morning with rakes."

Austin raised his eyebrows at me.

"He was our old neighbor's nephew. I played exploding snap with him once and next thing I know he's reading me poetry in the middle of the night," I explained. "I let him down easy."

"After we threw him in our garbage cans," James smirked.

"James!" Bubbles said. "That's a horrible thing to do. The boy was just trying to be romantic. What were the poems like, Lily?"

I gaped at her. "Well, _Cassandra_ he was a nine year old boy so they weren't all that romantic. Least not as romantic as all your imaginary boyfriends' must have been ."

She continued to smile even though I'd shot her down and instead focused on picking lint off James' sweatshirt.

"So, Lily, would you like to accompany me to the owlery?" Austin asked, probably noticing the rather impressive death glare I was sending towards Bubbles.

"Sure," I said.

"Are you guys going to the Village?" James asked absentmindedly.

We both shrugged.

"Well if you do, we're all trying to meet up in the leaky cauldron at around one—"

"But James," Bubbles whined. "I want to go to Madam Puddifoots!"

_Of course_ she did.

"Come on Lily," Austin whispered, seeing me open my mouth. "Let James fight his own battles."

"That girl isn't a battle," I mumbled as we headed towards the owlery. "She's a whole damn war and James is still too heartbroken over Julie to fight it on his own."

"Give him time," Austin said reassuringly. "I mean, we know James' attention span isn't all that impressive. I think he's just afraid of being alone. He'll get sick of her eventually."

"Merlin I hope so."

We continued chatting all the way up to the owlery and back down to the entrance hall that was nearly empty of students.

"So," Austin said awkwardly. "Did you wanna go down to the village?"

I stared at him for a second. Was he asking me out? Or was this an'_oh there's nothing to do we mine as well_' thing?

"Sure," I said.

I haven't really given much thought to Austin and I.

Okay that's a lie. I've definitely thought about it. I mean, we've gotten pretty close. We talk everyday and he's honestly become one of my best friends ( thought that's not saying much as I don't exactly have a lot of close friends ) . I just have to decide whether I want it to go any further. I mean, first of all he probably doesn't even see me that way. I'm two years younger than him _and_ I'm a Gryffindor (not that that has ever mattered to him, but still ).

Plus, it just seems odd for me to date the former best friend of the idiot Slytherin that broke my cousin's heart and almost wrecked our family (even if he is an amazing guy). I don't know, maybe I'm like James, maybe I don't really like Austin and I just don't wanna be alone. Or maybe I do like him, in which case I think I might be screwed.

"So, you know what we haven't talked about?" He asked me as we started off towards the village.

"Uhhh, global warming?" I offered.

He laughed and shook his head "No, your family."

"Austin, you know my family. And even if you didn't you could find out plenty through the prophet—"

"But that's not what I mean. I want to know about _your_ family, not the wizarding world's royal Potters. It's obvious you guys aren't exactly how they try to portray you."

I smiled. "Well, yeah, I agree. But they get it right sometimes or they at least get an interesting story when one of us screws up. Like last summer they printed an article about James and Jordan "_vandalizing_" a muggle supermarket. All that happened was James ran into a canned soup display. Dad made them revoke the article but James still felt pretty bad. We're lucky, our parents do a good job of keeping us out of the news, and it's not easy either. I heard that back before we were born, one of Rita Skeeter's articles almost ruined Aunt Hermione and Uncle Ron's wedding."

"Jordan used to have it bad, too. His parents business was always in the gossip section in Witch Weekly. And then last month they did a _Next Generation _story and James, Fred, and Jordan were all mentioned in that. It was pretty weird, they had like a rate the wizard thing, and I had to read a bunch of girl's letters about how fit my brother and cousin were. Rose was pretty pissed too, but that's just because she's nervous about Jordan being like, a national quidditch icon and forgetting about her or something…I'm sorry I'm totally rambling right now," I laughed.

Austin smiled. "No your not, keep going I find this interesting."

"Really?" I questioned.

He nodded so I continued.

"Wel, my family is kind of weird. My mom usually works from home, and my dad is there as much as he can be. We kids kind of bounce back and forth between houses, like I'll be over Rose's and Al will be at the burrow and James will be at the shop with Fred. Then when we are home, we always have people with us. Rose, Hugo, Corbin, Fred, whoever. Jordan actually lives with us most the time. He tries to stay away from his dad, because they usually row.

"And Teddy used be at our house all the time too, before he married Victiore. Then you factor in the famous quidditch players popping in from time to time for my mum to interview. I remember once Viktor Krum showed up and Uncle Ron had to stand in the yard until he left. Mum wouldn't tell me why though. Dad always has people there too, Aurors and such, sometimes reporters. But like I said he tries to keep out of the press. So basically, there is never a dull moment and somehow I fit into the most famous family in the wizarding world; it can be a lot to handle."

"Sounds like it," Austin said. "But you're lucky to have the family you do."

"I know," I said, nodding at him.

We held a comfortable silence until we got into the actual village, where we hit all the stores we could. Of course, we had a great time, and we also decided to skip the three broomsticks because I wanted to avoid the insanity that was going to ensue as a result of that little get together.

I don't think I could have had a better time with anyone but Austin, and I'm not sure if that means I fancy him.

Scorpius Malfoy said I did.

Yes, of course, we had to run into him. He was with some blonde slag from Slytherin. They were snogging up by the shrieking shack.

"I knew it," He yelled as we walked by, jogging to catch up with us and leaving his date behind. "Do the Potter trolls know your scamming on their sister Bentley?" He asked, smirking like an ass.

"Shouldn't you return to sucking face with the skank of the week?" I snapped.

"Hmmm, I see we like 'em feisty, huh?"

"Piss off Scorpius," Austin said.

"I can't wait to tell Nick about this," Malfoy laughed.

"So I'm confused," I said smartly. "Is Layndon king of the sleaze balls or are you?"

Malfoy continued to smile as he looked me up and down. "You've certainly got a big mouth for such a little girl, Potter."

"And you've certainly got a big ego for having such a little d—"

"Okay Lily, lets just go," Austin interrupted, pulling me away.

"I see we're still afraid of confrontation, Austin. Certainly a predictable trait of a traitor like you," Malfoy snarled.

"Oh, stuff it Scorpius,"Austin said. "You felt just as guilty about what Nick did last year as I did. Remember, you told me? You just didn't have the balls to stand up to Jacob—"

"No, I just didn't forget who my friends were."

"They aren't friends, Scorp! Brandon and Nick and whoever else you lot hang out with now, they aren't friends. We all got forced together by that damn sorting hat. You can't stand any of those bastards and you fricking know it. I listened to you last year when you complained about them. So why don't you stop putting on a front and—"

Malfoy pulled out his wand but Austin raised his hands. "Don't bother, we're leaving," he said.

I followed him silently as he left an angry Malfoy behind.

"Austin," I said.

"Yeah?"

"Wow."

He laughed. "Scorpius is actually a pretty decent guy, when you get past his little front."

 "I still think he's an ass," I mumbled.

He laughed again. "So are you about ready to head back to the castle?"

"Sure." I said.

It seemed that angering the great Scorpius Malfoy was the perfect end to the perfect day.

At leas,t until I returned to the castle where I had to bid Austin goodbye (and wish him luck sleeping in the same dorm as Malfoy) and deal with whatever drama my lot had managed to create that day.

As it turns out, Al and Leahah only fought 2 times and they didn't even break up. Corbin didn't have to get involved once!

That, my friend, is nothing short of amazing.

Kareana and Hugo really didn't seem to work out. Hugo said it was awkward and Kareana just shook her head as if to say "doesn't_ work._"

I'm sad to report that James and Bubbles are still together. She was feeding him grapes in the great hall at dinner.

Please excuse me while I vomit.

Anyway, surprisingly the couple with the most drama was Rose and Wood. Well, I wouldn't say drama as neither of them have a very slick grasp of what's going on. (As per usual).

See, Rose came to me when we were sitting in the common room, asking about Austin and such. So I told her all about him telling off Malfoy, we laughed at his expense, and then I asked how her date went.

"It was fine," she said. "Might have been better if Decklin didn't tag along though."

I raised my eyebrows. "Decklin was with you guys the whole time?"

"Yes," she answered swiftly. "Don't get me wrong, I like Decklin, I really do, but Jordan and I are never alone as it is."

"Did Jordan care?"

"Probably not, you know how those two get when they're together. I felt like a third wheel."

"Why didn't you say anything?" I asked.

"I don't know, Decklin just seemed lonely, I guess, but he's always around. I'm starting to think that maybe he has some kind of man crush on Jordan."

"Ehh, you're close. But I don't think its Jordan he has the crush on," I said.

Her eyes got wide and she gaped at me "No," She said. "We have no way of knowing that."

"Well, I had a hunch about this a few weeks ago, so I've been keeping an eye on it. Haven't you noticed that he talks to you more then anyone else, besides Jordan of course?"

"Maybe that's just because—"

"Rose, he and Jordan are one in the same, okay? When you come around they both get all smiley and it's obvious that Decklin cares about you more than any other girl I've seen him around."

"I just don't think we should jump to conclusions. I mean, he's a very strange boy, isn't he?"

"Fine, we won't, but I will figure him out, and you will see that I am correct. You now have two quidditch studs under your love spell," I laughed.

"Lily, you just said quidditch studs and love spell in the same sentence. Are you feeling okay?"

"Of course I am!" I smiled.

"Well I think a certain Slytherin has cast his love spell on you."

That wiped the smile off my face.

"Okay, let's stop using the term love spell, it's getting creepy."

"But you fancy him, don't you? You fancy Austin?"

"Keep your voice down woman!" I yelled, checking that no one had heard.

"Admit it, Potter!' she demanded.

"I don't know," I said.

And I really don't.

Damn

* * *

_Theses are pretty much intro chapters , I have alot in store for this story _

_Lily's gonna have drama out the ears _

_Something big is gonna happen in the Rose and Wood relationship ( dont worry , no pregnancy)_

_A few more new characters will pop up _

_ and Anyone But Me ended at a wedding , this story is ending in the opposite way ..._

_thats all im gonna say , but im suppperrrrrr excited , so i really hope you guys stick with the story_ :)


	6. We Know It's Going Straight to Hell

Have you ever felt like , maybe you were born to be the victim?

That's exactly how I felt today .

Like i had been victimized by Merlin , or whatever powers that be .

I wish I could erase everything about today from my memory PERMANENTLY.

Starting with this morning, when I was literally cornered in the common room.

Rose, Corbin, Jordan, Decklin, and I were all sitting, waiting for James, Al, and Hugo to go to breakfast. We all thought they were trying to have a lie in BUT they were actually formulating a game plan for their attack on my sanity.

"LILY LUNA!" James yelled as he walked towards us, Al and Hugo behind him.

" James " I said , yawning into my hand " It's like seven in the morning , there is literally no way I could have done anything wrong , it's too damn early ."

"Are you going out with Austin?" Al demanded.

"Excuse me?" I exclaimed, my stomach jumping into my throat.

"You heard him "Hugo snapped "are you going out with Austin?"

"Lily, don't answer them." Rose said, staring at the boys with disbelief "They need to give this _over protective brother_ routine a rest."

"Stay out of it Rose." James snarled.

"It's no more your business then it is mine." Rose said smartly.

"Oh stop "I said, shaking my head "No I'm not going out with him, where did you even hear that."

"Scorpius Malfoy." Al mumbled.

"Well thank you for at least asking me first before going off to bully Austin." I said.

"They wouldn't have honestly stoop to that level" Rose asked.

"We sure as hell would have." Albus said "he's two years older then her, that's not right."

"What?" I demanded, slowly losing the little bit of patience I had for the situation.

"Your fourteen Lily, he's sixteen. That's a big deal." Hugo said.

"It's really not." Rose spat. "You can't honestly tell Lily she can't date –"

"We honestly can." James retorted.

"What... how ... I ... what do you two think about this?" Rose demanded, turning towards Decklin and Wood, I guess hoping they'd side with us.

"I have no reason to dislike Austin, he seems nice." Decklin said.

"Thank you Decklin. "Rose and I both said, smiling at him.

"I plead the fifth. "Jordan said.

"Are you kidding me?" Rose asked angrily.

"What? Come on Rosie, she's fourteen that's too young to be dating a sixteen year old."

"It's two years!" I exclaimed with annoyance "Two bloody years. What's the big deal?"

"Lily, two years makes a big difference in teenage guys." Wood explained.

"No, that's rubbish "Rose snapped "and so is pleading the fifth, your not an American Jordan, there is no fifth amendment here!"

"We are getting extremely off topic "James said "The point we are trying to make is that there's gonna have to be some rules from now on."

I stared at him "Please tell me you lot aren't serious."

"I have compiled a list "James continued, taking a roll of paper from his pocket and handing it to me.

_1. Your ages must be within one year_

_2. The boy must clear any romantic intentions with us first_

_3. The boy cannot have a criminal record_

_4. The boy cannot be a git_

_5. The boy must show respect towards us as the family_

_6. The boy must also show fear towards us _

_7. Absolutely no sex_

_8. No public displays of affection in our presence or preferably anywhere _

_9. No goofy nicknames in our presence _

_10. The boy must have a general IQ above that of a troll_

I read the list and looked up at my brothers, who were smiling triumphantly. I still have no words to describe the amounts of frustration and annoyance I was experiencing. I don't know what made those boys think they had any right at all to tell me who I could or could not date, but it was ridiculous. We went through this last year with Rose. This exact same thing! They tried to tell her she couldn't date Layndon (granted they ended up being right about that). It didn't stop her and it wouldn't stop me.

"You'd better hand that list to Wood and Rose, it applies to them too." Hugo said.

Jordan raised his eyebrows and snorted, while Rose (who had read it over my shoulder) grabbed it out of my hands.

"This list is absolutely outrageous, there is no way either of us is following this ... this ... rubbish. You are our brothers, not our parents. You have no right to interfere in any of our relationships; I would have thought you would have learned that last year!"

"Hey if it wasn't for us interfering, then you and Wood wouldn't even be together." James said.

"And another thing is the hypocrisy! James you have broken every single one of these rules!" Rose yelled.

"I have not!"

"You definitely have James "I stated "you dated Lorie Appleby, she's two years younger then you."

(That's 1)

"So..."

"Not a single one of your girlfriends has ever asked us how we felt about your relationship." Rose added

(2)

"Well it's..."

"I'm pretty sure that, that girl Monica that graduated last year tried to steal a bunch of sugar Quills from Honeydukes, and you dated her for like a month." I said.

(3)

"That doesn't....."

"That one girl Cassidy you were with last year, tried to attack Lily remember? You called her a git all the time." Rose smiled

(4 and 5, because attempting to attack me is pretty disrespectful)

"Only because ..."

"And why would any of your girlfriends fear me, they all think I'm a little princess" I sneered.

(6)

"Well...."

"Unfortunately we all know you've broken rule number seven." Rose continued, making a disgusted face.

(Ewww)

"I can't tell you how many times I've seen you snogging some girl in a corridor "I grimaced.

(8)

"Your girlfriend in 3rd year used to call you Jamie baby every morning at breakfast."

(9)

"And your current girlfriend's IQ isn't anywhere close to being at the level of a troll, I'd say boulder is more like it ...."

(And that's 10)

"Enough!" James yelled "the Rules aren't for me, they're for you two."

"No." I said

"We're not following them if you don't." Rose added.

James looked at us for a second, as if he was going to continue to argue, but instead turned around and stormed out of the portrait hole.

"Oh way to go you two! "Jordan said "Now he'll be in a strop all day."

"I could care less" I snapped "and for the record, I'm not speaking to any of you. Except for Corbin who kept his mouth shut and Decklin who has a sense of propriety!"

"And I second that." Rose said

And we both stood up and marched out.

It was rather empowering. But Rose really didn't keep her promise; she and Wood were talking by the end of breakfast. I managed to ignore the lot of them until Lunch time. When James actually apologized and told me the list wasn't really supposed to be rules, but more like guidelines I should _try_ to follow. I told him I accept his apology but he could shove that list of _whatever he wanted to call them_ up his ass. He seemed satisfied with this answer.

So that disaster was over, even though I was still pretty peeved about the whole thing. If the situation ever came up (not saying that it would) and Austin actually asked me out or whatever, I know I'll catch hell for it. And it pisses me off, because they all love him, say he's a great guy ,and trust him with anything but dating me. It is ridiculous and totally unfair.

And another problem is Scorpius Malfoy . If he keeps telling everyone that me and Austin are together he could ruin one of the best friendships I've ever had ,and I'll be_ damned_ if I let that little ferret succeed in impacting my life in any way.

So here I was thinking about all this, as I made my way down to the quidditch pitch. I was obviously in a horrible mood. What with the events of that morning , Malfoy's big mouth , the homework I had yet to start , the fact that I hadn't been able to talk to Austin that day ,AND to top it all off I hadn't had dinner yet , and hunger doesn't necessarily improve my personality .

The one thing Merlin could have done was just let me reach the pitch peacefully so that I could fly out my frustrations. But like I said earlier Merlin seemed pretty satisfied with making me struggle today, and so, of course there was an obstacle in my path.

That obstacle stands about 5' 8", has suspiciously neat hair that's such a bright blonde he probably glows in the dark, has a known obsession with the spotlessness of his shoes, and a father that my uncle Ron usually refers to as "_the slimy twofaced git_".

Yes, it was the gossip queen himself, Scorpius sodding Malfoy decided to casually show up at Gryffindor's practice.

How utterly uncharacteristic of him.

"Ah little Princess Potter, just the lass I was hoping to run into." he smiled walking towards me.

"Sod off Malfoy; I'm in no mood for any of the crap that's bound to come out of your mouth. It's a waste of my time." I snapped.

"You sound frustrated Potter, whatever is the matter?" he questioned, feigning concern.

"You know right well what's the matter you tarty little sleaze ball!" I snapped "because of you, and the broomstick you seemed to have shoved up your ass, I now have to deal with my family watching me like a hawk every time I'm around Austin!"

"It's not my fault your afraid to stand up to them. Your cousin dated an enemy of theirs why cant you?" he asked.

"Austin's not their enemy." I said

"Right, right, they're best friends now. I forgot. But the point still stands; you don't seem to have the ability to stray away from your family."

I stared at him for a second "Why am I even talking to you?" I mumbled, trying to walk away.

"Because you know I raise a fair argument. You don't want to face the fact that without your family your nothing, without the _Potter_ your nameless... "

"Shut it Malfoy."

"It's not fair to blame me for your problems princess," he said. " Yes I may have let slip that you and Austin are getting cozy , but I didn't force them to try to control you and I certainly am not forcing you to bide by that control . "

"You know Malfoy, Austin told me that you could be a decent guy once you got past your little front. And I think he may be right." I said calmly, even though I was dying to hex him "So once you stop letting all those worthless slytherins control you, then you can preach to me, but right now just as I said you would be, you're wasting my time."

He looked rather annoyed, which was a nice change. The smirk was really starting to get to me.

"You're a clever one Potter, I'll give you that "he snapped, as I turned my back to leave "but you should know that you never turn your back on ...."

"_PATRIFICUS TOTALUS " _

I jumped and turned around to see Malfoy frozen on the ground, with his wand pointing at what had been my back.

"That little coward was gonna jinx me when my back was turned!" I said to myself.

"Lily! Are you ok?"

I looked up and saw Kareana jogging towards me. "I saw him reach for his wand, so I figured better safe then sorry."

She kicked his frozen foot and looked up at me.

"Thanks "I said

"No problem. What was he doing out here anyway?" she asked

"Oh, he was just-"

"I bet he was spying on our practice." She interrupted.

"No- I mean maybe, but _"

"Come on we need to tell Wood."

Before I could protest any further. She grabbed my arm and marched into the pitch.

"What about Malfoy?" I asked

"Just leave him, and hope for his sake he unfreezes before Wood gets to him."

I decided that Kareana probably isn't the best person to try to reason with so I just went along with her. If Malfoy had any sense he'd get as far away from this pitch as possible.

"Your late "Wood said, without even looking at us "both of you, laps "

"But Wood "Kareana said "we have a legitimate excuse. Turns out the Slytherins are sending Malfoy around to spy on us."

Wood turned around and looked at us.

"What?"

"Well we're not sure that's what he was doing." I said

"Sure we are "Kareana insisted "he was about to hex Lily, right outside the pitch. It's ok though I took care of it. But that's why we were late, so no laps right?"

Wood stared at her in mild shock "Uh no" he said "but wait ... what happened with Malfoy?"

"It's fine "Kareana said "I stunned him, me and Lily got away without a scratch and got here as soon as we could."

I'm starting to think that Kareana only wanted to use Malfoy as an excuse to get out of laps. In fact I bet she was up in her dorm putting on makeup (which she wore a lot of, even during practice) and when she found me and Malfoy she was ecstatic because that meant she had a legitimate excuse. That would be why she was so enthusiastic about telling Wood.

"Ok look, just get out there and we'll talk about this after practice yeah?" he sighed running a hand through his hair."

"Aye, aye Capitan "Kareana said, saluting him and taking off into the air.

"Lily" Wood said, as I mounted my broom "are you ok?"

"Yeah Wood, I'm fine "

I only lied a little bit. I wasn't physically hurt, but I was thinking about what Malfoy had said. I mean the thought of being too isolated by my family has crossed my mind, but now that other people are noticing it, people like Scorpius Malfoy, who usually never acknowledges my existence; it seems like a much bigger deal.

I was silent most of practice. Kareana had discreetly told everyone else about Malfoy so when Wood started the team talk at the end, there was no hesitation.

"There is an easy solution to this." James said "Fred and Grizz have a new product they've been working on that will make you forget what you're talking about every time someone says the word "the". I think the little snake deserves some mass confusion."

"Let's just get the entire Gryffindor table to throw their food at the Slytherins." Hugo suggested "I mean we've had food fights before, the detentions aren't so bad."

"Then of course there's always Violence "Kareana said, "In my experience it's very effective."

Everyone paused to look at her for a second before throwing out more suggestions.

"Enough "Wood finally said, once everyone had started talking at once (except me, who was staying out of it.) " We don't need to do anything that will get anyone into any trouble ok. We need to be spending our time practicing NOT in detention. So we're just going to increase security. We need to watch where and when we talk about team stuff, and that includes in front of Austin_"

"Wait, what?" I said.

Wood sighed "he's a slytherin Lily; we shouldn't be strategizing in front of him ..."

"But, he's been HELPING me Wood." I said.

"Yeah, that might have to stop."

"WHAT!"

"Lily, listen to me it's just a precaution. I don't want the Slytherins to know anything more about us then they do."

"But Austin wouldn't tell them anything Wood!"

"We know that Lily, it's a precaution. If he doesn't know anything then there's no way they can try to use him to get to us."

"Does it not occur to anyone how ridiculous this all sounds? We're playing quidditch not battling Voldemort!"

"Lily, it's not a big deal. I'm sure he'll understand."

"But –"I wanted to say that taking away his help was taking away an excuse to hang out with him, but I figured they really wouldn't want to hear that.

"Lily" Wood warned.

I shut my mouth and crossed my arms as Wood droned on about practice schedule and such. Then I went and sat out on the pitch until I was sure everyone was gone.

Well...... almost everyone.

"Lily, are you alright?"

I looked up and saw Decklin standing in the locker room doorway with his bag.

"I'm fine Decklin." I said

"Are you upset about Wood's decision regarding Austin?"

I looked over at him "A little bit "I finally said.

"If my understanding is correct "he said walking towards me "Austin is well liked amongst your family, Wood just doesn't want to risk the Slytherins getting information out of him, whether it is voluntary or otherwise."

"I know "I said

"You're also upset that they don't approve of you dating him?"

I stared at him. Decklin was strange, but he seemed to be genuinely concerned about me, underneath all that monotone.

"Yeah, Decklin, I am."

"They are only worried about you Lily. It has nothing to do with Austin; they just want to watch out for you because that is what families do. Correct?"

I smiled "Yes, correct."

"And I think that they would approve of you and Austin eventually. I have noticed that sometimes James gets over excited about things. You need to wait for him to get over it .At least that is what Wood said."

I laughed a little "Ok "

"Has talking about it helped you? Rose said that's the only way to feel better about things, but I am not sure if I believe her."

"Yes, Decklin it has helped. Thank you."

"Your welcome Lily, I will see you at Dinner."

I nodded and watched him leave the pitch.

Today was just confusing. And I spent most of it angry, which is never a good thing. I still don't know how I feel about Austin, and even if I did know ... I'm not sure how my family would react. I guess Decklin was right, but then again maybe Malfoy was too, maybe I shouldn't even care what they think. But If I don't have them, then....

Who do I have?


	7. Pass Me Another Bottle Honey

**sorry if my grammer is a little off**

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

My life is now a house of mirrors.

I mean this in a purely metaphorical sense of course , because it's like I'm in some insane alternate universe where things are opposite from what they should be.

1st off , as of right now I hate quidditch . And I'm not even technically on the team ! First match of the season is coming up . Us verses Ravenclaw, and I don't even think Wood has slept . Seriously , he's out of control , he said it's his last year to win the championship , which I understand . Doesn't mean he has to work the team until we're forced to soak in ice cubes after every training session! He actually had the nerve to row with Kareana the other day . He told her she should stop wearing so much make up to practice , because it can "_impair her vision_" and after all she was supposed to be a beater not a " _corner dwelling lady of the night_". While I agree that Kareana makes her self up just a little bit more then necessary , it's not nearly drastic enough to accuse her of prostitution . I thought she was going to quit the team after he said it , but luckily she just started yelling at everyone. Actually I'm not even sure what it was she was saying , mostly it just sounded like curse words.

Then of course that night Rose yelled at Jordan , because he had apparently "_finally crossed the line_" by making Kareana have a "_nervous breakdown." _(Which I'm pretty sure escalated to her dumping her makeup drawer out of the dormitory window , and concluded with her crawling around the grounds in the dark trying to find it all.)

" Jordan , it's quidditch!" Rose snapped, "It's not an army ,so you cant dictate the way a person looks , if she wants to wear her make up she should be allowed too , it's never bothered you in the past!"

" Actually Rose it has, he's hinted several times that she should wear less makeup to practices , but I think she just pretends not to hear him." Decklin said bravely .

We all watched as Rose and Wood raised their eyebrows in his direction . The only person that had ever interrupted their argument before was James , but that wasn't ever all that effective . Actually I think James was offended that they didn't scream at Decklin to shut his bloody mouth, since that was their usual reaction to interruptions.

" I'm the Capitan Rose, that means that I have the authority to dictate what ever the bloody hell I want if it will benefit the team . I really don't understand why your even questioning this , why do you even care?" Wood demanded.

" Because she and Kareana have become friends , since she is not longer speaking to Leahah since she started having a sexual relationship with Albus , so now she feels that she must defend her ." Decklin explained.

James and I started giggling as Al's face turned a deep red.

See him and Leahah decided to become " friends with benefits " , and Rose (knowing how that would turn out) tried to talk them out of it . Well , it ended up in a row and Rose hasn't spoken to either of them for a good week. The rest of us took less offence to the relationship and just found it very , very funny. Much like the row we were now witnessing.

" My point Jordan is that you need to take it down a few notches , your acting like a crazed dictator!" Rose exclaimed.

" HHHow am I being a crazed dictator , I'm just doing my job as a Capitan !!!"

" He has a point Rose, " Decklin interjected once again " If he was a crazed dictator he probably would have threatened Kareana with death , he merely just asked her to wear less make up."

Rose sighed and looked back and forth from Jordan to Decklin .

" Fine " she said " I give up , you're a Capitan I get it . I just wish you'd calm down a bit."

" Ok " Jordan said " I know you don't understand why I'm acting like this , it just means a lot to me . But .... I'll try to "_calm down_" alright ?"

Rose nodded and they hugged , and everything was better . It seems that having Decklin around can really help things . I know I've gotten a lot closer to him recently. He's nice to talk to Decklin is. Very objective , he never sugar coats things , and he has a pretty good grasp on reality . He and I sometimes stay down on the pitch for a while after practice and chat.

I tell him about my family and Austin . And sometimes he tells me stuff. Like I found out that , he lives with his uncle most of the time because his father is one of the coaches of the Tutshill Tornados. He's never told me about his mum ( so I never asked ) but I assume he doesn't ever see her. He has an older sister named Danielle , she models and has been in a few advertisements that have run in the prophet. The reason he talks like he does , is because his Aunt is very strict , in her house you must use manners , you cant use slang , and you absolutely cant curse. The last girlfriend he had was his neighbor when he was 10 , but he doesn't remember her name , and he's terrified of Dogs.

Really Decklin's become a best friend , besides Austin that is , who I'm still getting closer too. Thankfully Wood banning him from anything quidditch associated didn't prevent me from hanging out with him. We're together as much as we can be , whenever we have time . Sometimes we'll go down to the kitchens. I found out that he can actually cook rather well, which is pretty impressive. Usually , if the weather is nice we just hang out on the grounds . Like the other day , we walked over to the whomping Willow I got to tell the epic tale of the marauders , which he found very entertaining.

I'm really glad Austin and I have formed this nifty little friendship of ours , even if it is a bit out of the blue . The only thing I'm afraid of is getting TOO close to him , if you know what I mean. I'm still not entirely sure how I feel about him , and I know that sounds crazy because speaking objectively he is everything I've ever wanted in a guy , but I'm just not sure if I want to risk ruining everything we have. Plus I'm almost positive he doesn't feel that way for me .

So as of right now My best friends are Decklin and Austin , Rose's best friend is Kareana ( cause she's not talking to Leahah), James is still dating a girl who's irrationally annoying brain could not be personified by Celestina Warbeck's most bubbly love song , and I have a new enemy.

Scorpius Malfoy.

While we were not friends before , we seemed to have gained a lot of hostility recently . Mostly because he's determined to be the biggest prick to ever walked the halls of Hogwarts . He shows up randomly throughout the day , always finding things to make little comments about , trying to instigate a fight with me .

I've found out that he's afraid of Kareana . Not that I blame him , when we ran into him in the hall the day after she stunned him outside the quidditch pitch she told him she'd remove every single one of his toes with a dull knife if she ever caught him around our practice again. That threat was pretty effective because if I'm with Kareana, Malfoy is no where to be seen.

I haven't told anyone about his incessant harassment . Not Austin , not Decklin , not Rose , and especially not James . Hugo has a suspicion , Kareana told me he asked her to ask me why Malfoy is always glaring at me . I told her that he's always done that , so I guess that was good enough for Hugo because he dropped it .

Malfoy's not the only Slytherin that's been causing problems lately though .

Nick Layndon has been writing to Rose , and the worst part about that is , she didn't tell me !

I heard it from Decklin . She said she didn't tell me because she was trying to ignore it , and involving anyone in the family wouldn't do much to make it go away. I couldn't argue with that , because that's how I felt about Scorpius . But if James or Al or Hugo , _or Merlin forbid_ , Jordan ever found out Layndon would be in the hospital , no questions asked.

A part of me really wants to tell them , because Layndon is crossing lines . I know that now , after what I saw today. Rose and I were in the library. She was ( like a good cousin) helping me with the massive amount of homework I had been trying to pretend didn't exist .

" Lily , this would be so much easier if you would just stop procrastinating and ......oh you have got to be kidding me ."

I noticed her staring off over my shoulder, and when I turned around my eyes met with none other then Nick Layndon , heading right towards us .

" Shall I go and fetch Wood ?" I asked , smiling brightly .

" Lily stop it ." she snapped trying to hide her face , as if that would prevent her ex boyfriend from recognizing her .Real shame that plan didn't work out .

" Evening Rose " Layndon said awkwardly " Potter " he added curtly .

"Hello Nick ." Rose said politely .

" uhhh I need to talk to you ." Layndon whispered to her .

" So go ahead and talk ." I said , leaning back and looking at him .

He glared " I meant alone ."

" Actually I'd be more comfortable if Lily was here." Rose said

I smiled triumphantly as he huffed and pulled out a chair .

" Okay , I think we need to talk about some things ." he began .

" What kind of things? " Rose interrupted , " because I'm pretty sure we settled all that needed to be settled at the end of last year ."

" No we didn't ." he said " I know you still have feelings for me Rose , I can see it . Things aren't the same with Wood and you know it . I realize I messed up , that I hurt you , but what we had was –"

" Stop!" Rose said " Nick , what we had was absolutely fake . You never cared about me , I was a notch on your bedpost _"

" It wasn't like that ."

" Like hell it wasn't . I'm not as easy as I let you think I am Nick , I overlooked a lot of things that you did because you were all I had . I can see you only want me back because your alone-"

"That's ridiculous , do you really think I'd come over here and make a fool out of myself in front of Potter if I didn't honestly care about you ?" Layndon demanded.

Rose was silent for a second . I got scared because she looked like she was contemplating what he was saying , like she actually believed him.

"Even if that were true " she said in a small voice " Jordan is the best thing that ever happened to me , even when you and I were together –"

"So you did cheat on me then?" Layndon asked looking affronted .

" No , but I've loved Jordan since I was like 13 , even you couldn't change that ."

Layndon snorted " He's got you deluded Rose , you've forgotten everything we had , everything we _shared_ –"

" No , Nick I haven't forgotten anything , and the thing we _shared _isn't helping your case any."

" He was your rebound, and he was there when I broke your heart I get that –"

" Nick" Rose said sharply standing up " I'm done talking "

" Well I'm not" he said , standing up and moving around the table towards her .

I instinctively reached for my wand as Rose started backing away from him .

" Nick , please just leave ." She snapped.

" Rosie why cant you just give me a chance , didn't I prove that love makes the world go round?" he winked .

" So do tequila shots , what's your point ?" She said , her eyes darkening with disgust .

I'm assuming that this portion of the conversation was in reference to the drunken broom closet sex , that Rose never told me about until the end of the summer. Actually the drunkenness was mostly one-sided. Layndon pretty much took advantage of her and that makes him bringing it into that conversation ten times worse.

" My point is " he said , invading her personal space " You wouldn't have to get over me , if you were still under me."

Rose flushed , but otherwise looked appalled and pushed him away from her .

" Stop now ." she said fiercely.

" You know it's true " he whispered .

" She said stop Layndon! " I insisted.

" Stay out of this Potter , we're having a grown up conversation ." Layndon snapped .

" Nick I'm serious Stop-"

" OI! "

We all jumped as we heard a thick Irish accent .

" Are you having a difficult time grasping the definition of stop Layndon ?" Decklin asked , raising his eyebrows in a way that made him look pretty intimidating . Rose and I were shocked , I'd never pegged Decklin to be a confrontational guy , but he definitely had a very Wood-ish demeanor , which I think Layndon picked up on.

" Well if it isn't mini Wood " Layndon Crooned " you lot having a threesome now?" he sneered at Rose.

" Layndon I don't know you very well , and I'm not aware of exactly what happened between you an Rose last year , but I know how Wood regards you and I know how he cares for Rose , So I think it's acceptable to conclude that it was bad. So right now as someone who also cares for Rose I'm going to have to ask you to do as she asks and leave."

Layndon stared at him " Did you swallow up a dictionary ?"

" Your not funny Layndon " I snapped " Now get the hell outta here ."

" I'm here talking to ROSE, so both of you can just butt the hell out ." he snapped .

" Well it seems that Rose doesn't want to talk to you , which is understandable because you seem to be very demanding and obnoxious , two things that Rose isn't . So it would probably be in your best interest to leave ."

" So your threatening me now Krueger ?" Layndon hissed " didn't think you were the type. Damn Rose , you really have a habit of getting dumb Gryffindor quidditch players to eat out of the palm of your hand, granted this ones not as dumb as Wood , but I guess that doesn't matter long as you spread your le-"

BAM

Layndon dove out of the way of a curse that hit the bookshelf behind him .

" You don't want me as your enemy Krueger ." Layndon huffed , as me and Rose stared ,stunned at Decklin who still had his wand raised .

"I wouldn't want it any other way Layndon , now that I've heard the vile that comes out of your mouth ."

Nick stood up and glared at all of us , he looked like he wanted to say something or fight back , but instead he just turned around shaking his head and left the library.

" Damn Decklin ." I said , beaming at him.

He smiled lightly and pocketed his wand . " Are you alright Rose?" he asked.

"Yeah " she said , though it looked tears were brimming her eyes " Decklin I'm so sorry you had to get involved in that."

" It wasn't your fault. " he said consolingly , looking at her with more concern then I've ever seen him look at anything ( even his beaters bat the time he broke it in half ).

" Let's just go back to the common room " I said " We'll see if Wood's there."

Rose nodded and started to grab her stuff .

" Would you like me to help you?" Decklin asked.

" No" Rose mumbled , still sounding like she was about to cry " No , I'm fine ."

I wondered about her reaction the entire way back to the common room . I mean Layndon had said some things that were awful , but usually she doesn't let them get to her .And Decklin , well he was proving to be following in the exact same footsteps as Wood had . But that wasn't necessarily a good thing was it ? I mean there are some things that Decklin isn't gonna be able to do exactly like Wood, as of right now getting the girl is one of them , considering were talking about the same girl . This could definitely get messy .

When we got to the common room Wood and James were sitting by the fire talking to Corbin.

They looked up as we walked towards them . Wood was starring at Rose , as if he knew something was wrong . She walked over and sat down next to him without saying a word .

" Uh , we had a little conversation with Layndon." I said .

Their heads all snapped up .

" Of course you did" Corbin said " because Merlin forbid we go one day without some kind of issue with one of the slytherin slime balls ."

I looked over and saw Wood whispering in Rose's ear , she was shaking her head and her eyes started to glaze over .

" What happened ?" James asked , ignoring Rose and Wood .

" Well he wanted to talk to Rose , he started telling her all this bullocks about loving her and such , and then when he didn't leave Decklin stepped in and-"

" Tell me you knocked him on his ass Krueger!" James said with a smile.

Decklin hesitated " Uh , yes technically I did ."

James whooped and punched the air , " It's official Krueg , you are superman!"

Corbin and I laughed , as Decklin blushed and looked over at Wood and Rose .

Rose looked as though she had calmed down , whatever Wood had said to her had obviously done the trick .

Wood , despite being unmistakably angry ( and probably desiring to dismember a certain slytherin) reached his hand out to Decklin.

" Thanks for having my back mate." He said .

There was a flicker of hesitation before he took Wood's hand , and nodded " Not a problem ".

" Hey Wood , is it legal for Decklin to wear a cape during the match ?" James asked suddenly.

This loosened up the little bit of tension that was in the room and we all sat down and laughed.

Decklin spent the next hour staring into the fire , while I recapped the story to Hugo and Al , when they showed up. Rose and Wood disappeared to go off on a walk , and James and Corbin set to work making a cape , while Leahah obnoxiously critiqued their " sewing" skills as often as she could .

I was due to meet Austin to hang out on the grounds , but I didn't want to leave just yet . Decklin's reaction today and the hesitation to accept Wood's thank you had confirmed my suspicion . He had a thing for Rose . And it appeared that it was getting to him , he looked exactly how Wood had this time last year , staring into the fire all moodily while Rose was off with someone else. Now I don't think his feelings for her are nearly as profound as Wood's are. But sometimes I think crushes are more dangerous then actual love , infatuation can eat away at you.

" Hey Decklin" I said .

He looked up at me " Yes Lily?"

" You wanna go for a walk with me ?"

He looked taken aback for a second , but nodded and stood up, following me from the portrait hole .

" So where are we walking to ?" He asked .

" We're meeting Austin .. or well I was supposed to but I need to talk to you so I want you to come along ."

" What do you need to talk to me about?" He asked though I'm sure he already knew the answer .

" You fancy Rose don't you Decklin?"

He stared in front of him for a minute, as if wondering whether he could lie to me. Just as he was about to speak Austin ran up behind us .

" I was just coming to find you" he said to me " What the hell happened , Layndon came back screaming about "_mini Wood_".

" That's me " Decklin declared .

" Yeah I figured that ." Austin said , catching his breath " What did you do?"

" He was being extremely rude to Rose , and when she asked him to stop he didn't , so I just ..... stepped in." Decklin explained .

" Yeah well you'd better watch yourself for the next few days " Austin advised " they think they cant get one up on you since you're a year younger then them ."

" Don't worry, they cant ." Decklin said simply .

Austin smirked at him , and I snapped my fingers to get their attention.

" We have a bigger problem here." I said.

" What?" Austin asked .

" Well he hasn't confirmed it but I'm pretty sure that Decklin is crushing on Rosie ." I said .

Austin raised his eyebrows at Decklin who blushed. " Look " he said , in a very business-like tone " yes, I am attracted to Rose , BUT I would never act on it because I respect both her and Jordan far to much to ruin their happiness. I'm not blind I see that they're meant for each other , these feelings I have for her will pass."

" Yeah but it hurts you." I said .

" It would hurt them worse if they knew ." he said solemnly .

"We just need to find you a girl mate ." Austin chirped, obviously trying to lighten the mood .

" I'm no good at that kind of stuff." Decklin admitted .

" We'll help you " I said , and Austin nodded " I don't want to see you depressed Decklin , so we'll help you anyway we can."

He sighed and nodded.

And just like that Austin and I had a new project.

_**I know it's been forever and I'm really sorry, I also know this story is going slow , but that's only because I have a lot in store for it and I'm planning on it being rather long. I promise it will pick up soon though.**_

_**I definitely quoted Nick and Norah's infinate playlist , if anyone caught that .**_

_**But anywayyyyyyy reviews would be great..... What do you think I have planned ? What would you like to see happen? Anything you have to say , id love to hear it **_

**Thanks for reading **




	8. But If It Keeps You Around Then Im Down

"_We just need to find you a girl mate." Austin chirped, obviously trying to lighten the mood._

"_I'm no good at that kind of stuff." Decklin admitted._

"_We'll help you "I said, and Austin nodded "I don't want to see you depressed Decklin, so we'll help you anyway we can."_

_He sighed._

_And just like that Austin and I had a new project_.

Finding Decklin a girlfriend ... definitely not easy.

First problem, Decklin has no desire to have a social life; he is perfectly satisfied with going to classes, quidditch practice, and doing homework.

Now I can't make a big fuss about that, because it's pretty much what I do. The difference is that when we're walking through the halls people always wave and say hi to me. I mean sure I may not have a great relationship with any of them, but they know me. Decklin is surprisingly invisible at Hogwarts. And really he could be as popular as James and Wood. In fact I'm sure hanging out with them will expose him more, but in order for him to start dating, I'm gonna have to teach him to put himself out there. And that might mean that I have to do the same.

The ideal girl for Decklin (being a hunky quidditch player and all) is probably one of Hogwarts "popular" girls, like Bethany Leap. The problem with that whole quidditch player + queen bee logic is that Decklin has a very... unique personality. While he is obsessed with quidditch, he is also a very intellectual person; those girls are anything but that. So now I need to find a girl that can help him come out of his shell, and not be bored or freaked out by his general persona.

Like I said, not easy.

Austin's been trying to talk to him. You know, guy talk or whatever. He said he's trying to figure out if Decklin has a type. From my understanding that means that Austin names a bunch of girls and Decklin says why he does or doesn't find them attractive. Well as it turns out Decklin isn't really responsive to that kind of " guy talk" and the only thing Austin found out is that he fancies Rose because of her intelligence ( though I'm sure there are other reasons as well ) and that he'd never date Kareana because she scares him ( which is understandable).

He's just completely helpless when it comes to girls. It can be almost pathetic at times.

For instance last night, the night before our first match.

Wood had decided to give the team a break from practicing so that they could eat. He didn't however take a break from captaining, because he strolled up and down the table making sure his players didn't, "Stuff there faces with so much food that they become useless fat lumps on his quidditch pitch".

I was ignoring him and arguing with Al over the most effective way to eat spaghetti, while Decklin was sitting next to me watching out of the corner of his eye as Rose scorned her boyfriend for being such a control freak.

That's when she came over.

Leahah , _Al's friend turned girlfriend turned ex girlfriend ( at least 3 times ) turned sworn enemy turned soul mate turned friend with benefits turned ... well... back to sworn enemy ._

She comes flouncing over to where we were sitting and plops right down next to poor Decklin. Al thankfully was able to ignore her at first, and of course Leahah couldn't have that. So she attempted to make him jealous... using Decklin.

"So Decklin" Leahah said smoothly "are you nervous about the game tomorrow?"

He didn't look up from his food but answered her swiftly " Yes , even though I think we are fully prepared and more than capable of defeating Ravenclaw I worry that some how we will not meet the standards necessary for victory. Quidditch can be unpredictable after all."

Leahah smiled "I love when you talk about quidditch, you sound so passionate."

"Umm, thank you?" Decklin said.

"It's true, I find it very sexy."

I rolled eyes and stared at her, while both Al and Decklin started choking on their food.

"Um, well ... I... Um" Decklin stuttered

"You know Decklin; these girls in the loo yesterday were talking about you, your bum specifically. I didn't pay them much mind but now that I think on it your do have _"

"Are you being serious right now?" Al demanded, slamming his utensils on the table and making Decklin nearly fall off the bench.

"Ignore him Decklin; he's just got his knickers in a twist because I never complimented his assets." Leahah smirked.

Decklin's face was now almost as red as Al's... though I'd describe his as a little more purple.

"Leahah" I said calmly "Aren't you hungry? Maybe you should eat, and you know... shut up?"

"Of course "Leahah said, smiling a little too suspiciously. She then proceeded to lean down the table, over Decklin (successfully sticking her chest in his face) to grab a basket of bread. Decklin of course tried to move out of the way, and unfortunately fell backwards off the bench.

I gasped as Al stood up.

"YOU KNOW WHAT LEAHAH!" he yelled "I'D REALLY APPRICIATE IT IF YOU'D REFRAIN FROM THROWING YOURSELF AT MY MATES WHILE I'M TRYING TO EAT DINNER!"

" I WASN'T THROWING MYSELF AT ANYONE YOU LOUSY SOD!" she yelled back ( drawing the attention of the entire table) " AND I COULD CARE LESS ABOUT DISTURBING YOUR EATING HABITS, DISGUSTING AS THE ARE."

"DISGUSTING? YOU WANNA KNOW WHATS DISGUSTING? YOU , SHOVING YOUR TITS OUT FOR THE WHOLE DAMN WORLD TO SEE , RIGHT IN DECKLINS FACE , YOU MADE HIM FALL OF THE BLOODY BENCH YOU TART!"

"OH MERLIN AL, DON'T EVEN. JUST BECAUSE YOU'RE JEALOUS OF DECKLIN GETTING A BETTER VIEW THEN YOU EVER WILL AGAIN-"

"OH YEAH LEAHAH THAT'S IT, THAT'S EXACLTY WHAT I'M UPSET ABOUT, YOU HIT THE NAIL RIGHT ON THE **BLOODY HEAD**."

I leaned back as Al's eyes started popping out of his head. Decklin was still laying on the ground watching the scene above him in horror. Leahah was thinking really hard, I assume looking for the absolute worst thing she could say. Luckily she never had the chance to respond, because Capitan Wood was now aware of the disturbance.

"What is going on?" he asked, storming down to our end of the table. "Why is my beater on the ground?"

"I'm fine Wood" Decklin said, standing up slowly.

"Leahah shoved her boobs in his face." I explained. She shot me a dirty look, but I just shrugged it off.

Wood looked over to Al "Is that what you're screaming about?"

"Pretty much." Al said, glaring at his ex-girlfriend.

"Right then" Wood said, turning to Leahah "I will not have you messing around my quidditch players before a match! In fact, a new rule of thumb, everyone on this team will remain celibate, in every possible way there is to be celibate for at least 24 hours before every match. That means no snogging, no flirting, NO STICKING YOUR... BOOBS IN MY PLAYERS FACE!"

We all stared at him "Does that apply to everyone?" I asked.

"Yes" he said, glaring at Leahah as she stood up and stormed away.

"Well then you'd better go and fetch James, because he and Bubbles just left the hall with awfully big smiles on their faces." I grinned

"BLOODY HELL!" he exclaimed, turning around to storm out of the hall.

"Do you think he was really serious about that celibate thing?" Al asked, his face returning to its usual color.

"Yeah" I said "At least until he realizes that it applies to him and Rosie as well."

Wood came to that realization very harshly that night. When he tried to kiss Rose goodnight and she pulled away. It wouldn't have been a big deal, but apparently some third year walked by him and said something to the degree of "Damn, Wood just got whored". James had to urge Wood and his wounded pride up the stairs, his last words were "Anybody on my roster better is in bed in ten minutes or I'll have your asses." In all honesty Wood never would have known whether or not most of us actually went to bed, but we did. Even though all I was doing the next day was sitting in the stands I still had butterflies. This was my team whether I would be flying with them or not, and a loss the next day would pretty much put a nail in our season, and most of us wouldn't be able to handle that. There was a tight fixed clenching in my stomach until they kicked off the ground the next morning. Wood took the quaffle and had it through Ravenclaws goalposts within 2 minutes.

I was sitting in the stands with Rose and Austin; all three of us were glued to the game in its entirety. Cheering for Decklin when he recovered Kareana's dropped bat and hit the quaffle to Wood in the same dive, trying to be louder then the Slytherin when they booed every time Hugo made a save, and encouraging Al until he finally grabbed the snitch about an hour into to the match. It was over; we had won our first game. As excited as I was, the only thing I remembered was the last two minutes, because Austin (in all the excitement I guess) grabbed my hand. I mean obviously I knew I had some kind of feelings for him, but I've spent most of my time trying to suppress them. Attempting to have anything with Austin would be sticky, but there's this part of me that doesn't care. A part of me that's so blinded by the cutsie butterfly effect of everything he does, that it forgets what having feelings for him would mean.

Rows, duels, and broken hearts. Most likely in that order.

We only held hands until everyone stood up, in the mad rush to get to the victory party that some forth years were planning at the top of their lungs his fingers slipped out of my grasp. The butterflies never faded though, in fact they got worse as he came up behind me, whispering in a way that I could loosely interpret as seductive. "I'll see you later."

Indeed he would, because everyone was invited to the celebration. The party that I knew would end just as every other party did. When you have a confined area, dozens of hormone fueled teenagers, stolen liquor, and access to most of my Uncles joke products, the results tend to be predictable.

First there was the accidental hook up. The snogging session that both parties would grow to regret, whether it was because someone wasn't single or one of them had an extremely protective sibling, the accidental hook up always resulted in severe repercussions. This time, the unfortunate victims were my dopey, lovable cousin Hugo and Ms. Kick ass quidditch Vixen herself, Kareana Taylor.

I didn't see the actual kiss, I heard about it from Leahah who made a sly comment about how Albus was gonna be the only one not getting any action. At first I didn't believe her, and then I saw Kareana sitting in a chair staring into the fire, feet crossed in front of her with a bottle between her knees. She looked like she had just singed her own death certificate. Hugo was a few paces behind her, a curious smile on his face, one that made it seem like he was under the influence of some kind of hallucinogen. He kept glancing in her direction, at which point Corbin would try to draw his attention away. Corbin was always good at damage control, and since I figured he had Hugo covered I walked over to Kareana, sat on the arm of her chair, and waited. Eventually she looked up at me, rolling her eyes in a way that replaced sarcasm with sympathy.

"I didn't know what I was doing." She said "I'm not sober, and he's just ...a nice kid."

"You told me you didn't fancy him like that." I said dryly, trying to scan the room in case Austin had arrived without me noticing.

"I don't know what I want right now Lily, my fucking head is spinning." She sighed and rubbed her eyes.

"Well then, you'd better sober up. I like you Kareana but in case you haven't noticed my family and me, we are a rather protective bunch. Don't mess Hugo around, he's probably one of the nicest kids you'll ever meet."

She never made eye contact with me while I was talking, part of me wondered if she'd even remember this in the morning, but as far as cousinly duties go I had done mine. I decided the most effective way to spend my time was to find Austin, which I did... in the most unflattering way possible. See after leaving Kareana I ran into Rose, who was talking to Decklin and this boy Brian Jordan. It was a pleasant conversation, filled with laughter and jokes and half a cup of butter beer flying out of my nose and landing right on Austin's left shoe.

"Nice to see you too Lil" he said as my face turned 15 shades of red "anyone have a napkin?"

Rose giggled as I pushed her out of the way, stretching towards the drink table for a scarlet napkin.

"I'm sorry about that Austin, really." I said, wondering whether is should start slurring my words so I could use alcohol as the excuse for any future fuck ups.

"I'm not upset." He said "It was cute."

I raised my eyebrows at him and shook my head. "You don't have to bullshit me Austin."

"I'm not."

We had one of those movie moments, where we just stare at each other for a while, and then it starts to seem like he's moving closer... like ridiculously slowly , almost as if waiting for someone to run into us , or call one of our names , or light a near-by armchair on fire as a diversion so they could try to remedy the ass kicking they were getting from first years in beer pong.

Who would do such a thing? Why even ask...why even wonder because no person could ever manage to have such consistent bad timing, no one in the world can ever level up to the cockblocking capabilities of James Potter... even when they aren't intentional.

"Your brother is wild." Austin said awkwardly, coughing and looking back down towards his wet shoe.

"Yeah, Mom and Dad are real proud." I said glaring at my brother, who had apparently decided to accept defeat and wash it down with more fire whiskey. "He ruins everything." I mumbled, smiling at Austin flirtatiously "Wanna go take a walk or..."

"Actually" he said, without meeting my eyes, "I was gonna find Decklin and talk to him... and your brother too."

"Oh, well then I guess I'll talk to you later?" I said, slightly put out.

"Yeah, yeah definitely." He grinned at me one more time before disappearing into the crowd, leaving me with this weird unsettling feeling in my stomach.

"What's wrong Lily?" Rose asked as I wandered back over to where she was, now attempting to have a conversation with her blatantly intoxicated little brother "You look like someone just shit on your fairytale happy ending."

"Oh saw that did you?" I asked plopping down next to Hugo.

"Relax Lily, everything is meant to be. It'll happen when it happens."

"Yeah, Rose. That's reassuring, I'm never gonna get laid as long as James is around."

Totally joking about the getting laid part, I'm not a slag; I just have a sense of humor. Well whether it was that statement or his name that got James' attention, he came right over.

"Your damn right you wont be getting laid." He slurred, glaring at me as if I had just exposed myself to the room.

"Calm down James it was a joke_"

"Sex is not a joke Lily! YOU CAN GET DISEASES!"

Rose snorted as I stared at my brother... well quite frankly after his outburst I wasn't the only one staring.

"You are...twelve years old Lily!" he continued, ignoring my correction, that I am in fact FOURTEEN. "You can just go around talking about sex, you'll get pregnant and then Dad and Mom will have to retire from the public life because of embarrassment, we'll run out of money and then everything I have worked for will be nothing and well live in the slums Lily, Like Jordan's crack head Aunt in the US, she's a CRACKHEAD Lily, that's DRUGS! IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT?"

"James, calm down your drunk." Rose said, rolling her eyes.

"ALCOHOL LILY! ALCOHOL AND SEX IT LEADS TO KIDS WITH MENTAL PROBLEMS AND THEY DONT DESERVE THAT AND NEITHER DOES OUR GRANDMOTHER...SHES REALLY OLD LILY!"

"You are embarrassing yourself James." Rose said again, trying to ease him into a chair as the rest of the room started laughing (myself included).

"AND YOU ROSE!" he yelled "YOU'RE THE WORST OF ALL THE GIRLS, BECAUSE I SAW THAT JORDAN HAD CONDOMS IN HIS TRUNK! I KNOW WHAT YOU DO WITH CONDOMS ROSE; YOUR DAD WOULD KILL EVERYONE IN THIS ROOM WITH HIS BARE HANDS IF HE FOUND OUT! AND I JUST MIGHT TELL HIM!"

Rose's jaw dropped almost as fast as the surrounding people took a step back.

"Potter! How dare you shout my business to an entire room of people?" she hissed, trying to keep him at a quieter level as to avoid more embarrassment.

"How dare YOU think about having sex? I will be having a talk with Wood later AND I WILL PUT A STOP TO THIS NONSENSE!"

"James really, shut up" I said "everyone here knows your not a virgin."

"I AM JAMES POTTER AND THAT'S ALL THAT MATTERS!" he said kicking the coffee table in front of him, and waking Hugo up from the drunken slumber he had slipped into.

"Someone please take him to bed!" Rose called out, "Decklin?"

Almost the second she said it Decklin appeared, walking over to James cautiously and offering him his hand. "Ready for bed mate?" he asked.

"Krueg, Lily wants to get laid." James said as he stood up "I feel so old and grossed out ... she used to play with dolls and now she wants to play with boys Decklin!"

"Oh Merlin get him out of here." I pleaded, looking around and seeing that thankfully Austin wasn't around to hear that.

"Come on James" Decklin said, dragging him towards the stairs as the room applauded him.

"I WILL BE REMEMBERED!" was the last thing we heard him say, before the room broke back into its previous conversations.

"So "I said, as Rose's face regained its usual color "Condoms huh?"

She rolled her eyes and ignored me.

"Where is Jordan anyway?" I asked, noticing that she looked a little less than happy.

"He went to be early, said he had to think" she said, throwing a napkin into the fire.

"You two row or something?"

"He heard from a scout" she said, smiling in an over the top way "Isn't that amazing?"

"Yes!" I exclaimed " from where?"

"Ireland" she said, her smile starting to fade.

"Shouldn't he be down here celebrating? With you?" I asked.

"He's just confused."

"You too?"

She looked at me for a second, almost like she considered lying "I'm just scared Lil, I'm so happy for him, but... I'm scared."

"He loves you Rose" I said reassuringly "Don't be Sc-"

"I know." She said, standing up quickly "I'm gonna go to bed, Lily could you... could you just see to it that Hugo gets upstairs alright?"

"Yeah" I nodded.

Rose disappeared, and as I sat there watching the fire smolder the rest of the room did too. I walked Hugo to the stairs and I'm pretty sure he made it to the dormitories. I saw Al sneak in from where ever he was, and thought I saw Leahah follow a short time after. The only person I really lost track of was Austin.

I don't really want to think about why he disappeared so quickly, or why he didn't come to talk to me the rest of the night. It makes my stomach ache, and I'd rather pretend that everything will be ok tomorrow than stress away a good night's sleep.

Tomorrow is another day, and hopefully I'll find answers... and maybe some hangover cure.

**_ok there it is...i know its been forever , i have no excuse , but i am sorry._**

**_I hope this was ok, i know it may not be , but im getting back into the swing of this_**

**_reviews would be great_**


	9. Though I'm Hardly Worth Your Time

**Im back! Check out my profile for an update.**

The universe puts limitations on everything.

Every pleasant feeling has to come in moderation, every little bit of luck has to end sometime, and eventually if you smile too much your face will start to ache. Some unfortunate ignorant people try to pull one over on the world, like Voldemort who ripped his soul apart in order to achieve some sense of domination over death, his rein didn't last long though and I imagine he suffered a lot more than he achieved. Me? I'm not interested in immortality. I just don't understand why the world has to follow such a happy day with such a terrible morning.

I get it! Alcohol is poison to your body so you feel like shit the next day. Punish me for drinking, that's fine, but why, WHY can't I seem to stop feeling miserable about Austin leaving last night? It's not as though he turned me down, we didn't even really get to talk. And we did have a moment, we definitely had a moment. There could have been an emergency, or maybe he was in the bathroom or something and I just never noticed him when he came back! Or maybe he thinks I'm an annoying little dweeb, and decided he'd rather be anywhere other than where I am. I CANT TAKE THIS INTERNAL STRUGGLE ANYMORE! I need to get out of this room!

I rolled out of bed, not even concerned with being quiet even though my dorm mates were sleeping. I've never really made a connection with any of them. It's hard for me to relate to people I guess. Growing up I was only really close with my family. I always thought that once I got to Hogwarts things would change. I saw myself always surrounded by a big group of friends, only occasionally waving to my family in the corridors or sharing meals with them on special occasions. It didn't work out like that though; even though I talk to my classmates in classes and sometimes share a laugh with my roommates it has never gone any deeper than that. Sometimes my family will lecture me about "putting myself out there more" as if I was some kind of social leper. But I truly feel like it's my last name that creates the barrier between me and the rest of the world. Just because I'm Harry Potter's daughter, I'm held at a different standard and I can tell that that intimidates people. And it's the same for everyone else. Hugo hasn't really connected with any one. Al's only best friend outside of the family is Corbin who he met because of quidditch tryouts (and who is also a muggle born that wasn't aware of our fame). The same was the case for Fred and Grizz (Grizz's parents were both magical but he never met either of them and being raised by his muggle Uncle he was ignorant of our world his whole life also). Rose got lucky with Leahah, even though they hate each other half the time they just mesh well with one another. And James befriended a kid with a last name almost as famous as ours (Woods Dad being a quidditch phenomenon). I don't see how it's such a big deal that I don't have a best friend. There's nothing wrong with Hugo, he's been my best friend my whole life and if I need a girls perspective I ask Rose, even though she hasn't been very helpful with this Austin situation.

My stomach panged as I thought of him. And I finished throwing sweats on so I could leave this room and find something to take my mind off of depressing things. I took the steps down to the common room one at a time, hoping that I wasn't the earliest riser. Thankfully I saw Hugo sitting happily in the armchair by the fireplace.

"What the bloody hell could you possibly be smiling about?" I asked him, as I sat down on the chair's arm.

"Well Lily, as it turns out yours truly is quite the ladies man."

"Hugo_" I began, but he raised his hand to silence me, "Please don't ruin this for me by being bitter." He said "Let's just go down to breakfast."

Even though I didn't see the reality of Hugo's inevitable rejection as "being bitter", I knew better than to push the matter. As happy as he looked he was still hung over and if I pushed him too much he'd be in a strop the rest of the day. And so we went down to breakfast, even though the thought of food made me want to vomit. Hugo was a different story. Never in the entirety of my life have I ever seen Hugo Weasley skip a meal or turn down food. Not when he was ill, or had had a large meal earlier in the day, not even when Hagrid attempts (and fails miserably) to make us sweets when we have tea. In a disaster situation, I know Hugo would be the first to succumb to cannibalism.

I noticed he was scanning the Great Hall for Kareana as we walked to Gryffindor's table. I sighed to myself, but knew she wouldn't roll out of bed until after lunch. Decklin, Rose, and Jordan were already eating when we sat down, none of them looking particularly hung-over, in fact Wood looked downright cheery.

"Where's James?" Hugo asked, grabbing a piece of every meat within his reach.

"He got a letter." Rose said sadly.

Most of the time James's letters were from Julie, and if that was the case than he would be off moping for the rest of the day. You would think that whole _out of sight, out of mind concept _would apply, but nope. Even with a "girlfriend" James was still horrifically depressed over a girl he had met only twice.

"He made a right fool out of himself last night." I said, shaking my head.

"I expect that he knows that." Decklin said, "He began to cry once I got him up to his dorm, he told me I was like the son he never had."

"He has no concept of his own limitations." Rose sighed.

"So where were you all last night Wood?" Hugo asked, "You missed a lot mate."

"I was thinking some things through." He said, smiling "I talked to that recruiter from Ireland for a while after the game."

The second he said "Ireland" Rose had gone rigid. I knew she would keep it bottled inside as long as she possibly could, but it was obvious that the idea of her boyfriend being so far away terrified her. As per usual though, it was obvious to everyone but Jordan.

"Blimey Wood," Hugo said, through a mouthful of what looked like bacon, ham, sausage, potatoes, and eggs wrapped in a pancake. "and it's only the first game of the season!"

"I know." He beamed, "I mean it's not Puddlemere, but it's something to think about."

Rose busied herself with adding milk and sugar to her coffee. I noticed Decklin touch her hand reassuringly for just a few seconds, after which she seemed to calm down. I kicked him under the table and his eyes shot up to meet mine. Before I could start to wordlessly scorn him Al and Corbin stormed over, the later of the two looking exceptionally angry.

"I've about had it with the filthy thieves in this school." Corbin barked as Al rolled his eyes.

"What was stolen?" Decklin asked, looking away from me with relief.

"Nothing." Al said. Corbin glared at him.

"Someone is stealing my shampoo!" he said, "Every morning it feels lighter and lighter, and I don't use that much!"

We all stared at him.

"Someone is syphoning out your shampoo?" Wood asked slowly.

"Can you believe that?!" Corbin demanded.

"I don't understand," Hugo began "you don't really have a lot of hair, it's very close shaven isn't it?"

Corbin looked insane with rage as he turned his head to face Hugo "So you think that just because I don't have your curly white boy locks I DON'T USE SOAP!? MY HEAD GETS JUST AS DIRTY AS ANY OF YOURS!"

"Sweet Merlin mate, get ahold of yourself!" Albus said.

"Is it like_ special shampoo or_" I questioned.

He seemed to get angrier.

"No! But it's still MINE! So no one else should take it! Hugo's not special, but I bet Ron and Hermione would be pissed if someone snatched him up!"

Hugo looked at him with shock.

"I'm gonna find out who did it though, it's someone in that dorm! That shampoo has a distinct smell to it_"

"Corbin I swear if you go around smelling people's hair our friendship is over." Al said

"I'm going to become a cop, just like my dad was!" Corbin continued "So that I can stop things like this from happening!"

"Do you really think muggle police involve themselves in cases of missing shampoo?" Rose asked genuinely.

"Is someone stealing your shampoo Rose?" Corbin asked menacingly.

She sighed "No."

"Then you will never understand!" he got up quickly, "I'm going to research security spells in the library." And he stormed off.

Al started to laugh.

"It's you isn't it?" Wood asked as he refilled his pumpkin juice.

"I used it once last week and he freaked out, so ever since I've been pouring some down the drain every time I shower." He said between laughs. "It's nice, smells a bit like coconuts."

"Why doesn't he just hide it then? Seems rather obvious doesn't it?" Hugo suggested, still visibly irritated by Corbin's insults.

"He tried, I found it." Al boasted with a grin.

"Al that's_" Rose's eyes got big as she stopped mid-sentence and pointed at Al's neck. "What is that!?" she demanded.

He grinned as everyone leaned towards him to get a better look.

"Oh EWWW!" I said, "Is that a hickey?!"

Al smirked, causing Jordan and Hugo to laugh lightly and Rose to look outraged.

"You will not be satisfied until you thoroughly ruin my relationship with Leahah will you?!" she snapped.

"Don't be so dramatic." Al retorted.

"You could at least charm it, so no one can see it instead of walking around like a _ a_ hussy!"

"I don't think hussy is a term that applies to males Rose"

"Not now Decklin!"

"It does look a bit nasty mate," Wood chimed in "like some kind of rash."

I didn't hear Al's response, because someone had just plopped down in the seat next to me, someone who I found much more interesting than my slut of a brother.

"Sorry I took off without saying goodbye last night," Austin said quietly "I had the worst headache and James was just so loud."

I laughed a little bit and felt my stomach unclench. He wasn't avoiding me! He was avoiding my other slut of a brother and his drunken fits.

"I take it he's still in bed nursing a hang-over?" he asked, noticing James's absence from the table.

"I'm not sure where he is, he got a letter from Julie." I explained.

"That girl has terrible timing."

"She sure does. I still haven't decided if I hate her yet."

He laughed and we both looked over as the argument between Al and Rose increased significantly in volume. Wood was leaning backwards as to not be in the middle, Hugo was on his third plate of food , and Decklin looked very concerned with the whole scene.

"What is going on?" Austin whispered to me.

"Al and Leahah drama." I said, rolling my eyes.

"Right, business as usual then." He laughed "You want to head down to the pitch? I could use a good lap or too."

The giant smile on my face was embarrassing as I stood up to follow him from the hall.

"Oi, where are you two going?" Hugo asked as I walked by.

"Down to the pitch, I'll catch up with you lot later."

On the walk down Austin was unusually talkative. Apparently his room was chaotic last night. Layndon stumbled in and had a fit; broke almost everything he owned.

"He had to have been on something." Austin said "The bloke had the craziest look in his eyes and I couldn't even understand what he was yelling about."

"Weren't you afraid he was going to attack you?" I asked.

He laughed "I have to worry about that every night, but no he was just a mess. It was pathetic actually."

"I can't say I feel bad for him."

"Well sometimes I do. I mean it's hard to shake old habits you know? He was my best mate for years; he didn't start acting like such a prat until very recently. Sometimes I wish that I'd wake up and he'd be the same kid he was three years ago, but what's done is done I guess. I'll always see him for what he's become."

"I don't know how you do it Austin, it's like you have to watch your back even when you're sleeping."

"I'm practiced at watching my back; I am a Slytherin after all."

I laughed and we picked up speed as we approached the pitch.

"As far as I remember, the pitch is free until after lunch when Ravenclaw has it. So we should be _"

I put my arm out and stopped him. Someone was sitting in the middle of the field.

"Reckon we should leave him be?" Austin asked me.

I shook my head and started towards him. "James?"

He turned and smiled at me. It was that same smile my Dad has when strangers come up to him and shake his hand and thank him for being the chosen one. It's the friendliest fake smile I've ever seen.

"Hey Lil." He said "and you've brought Austin with you. Thought you were done with your little training sessions?" He sounded bitter. Maybe that was why Austin hung back and allowed me to sit down next to him alone.

"Do you want to talk about it?" I asked him.

He glanced back to see the distance between himself and Austin

"I don't have much to say to be honest."

"Yeah right, you'd sooner drop out of school to form an Irish folk band with Decklin before you'd ever run out of things to say.

" I just don't understand her Lily. I told her about Cassandra and do you know how she replied? 'Oh James I'm so happy for you, she sounds amazing! I can't wait to meet her'" He imitated Julie in a very unflattering high-pitched voice. " Its bullocks , she's perfect for me in every way and she knows it! I know she knows it! There is no way she doesn't feel it too, no way in hell, so HOW can she be happy that I'm with another girl. I fucking HATE that she's with another guy!"

"Honestly James what is so special about this girl?!" I demanded " Look at yourself! I've never seen you this bent out of shape. Just stop talking to her, look what its doing to you! You're not even enjoying your last year."

He held his face in his hands for a minute and then looked at me with a sincerity that I rarely see in my brother. Usually James serves as the comedic relief. He is able to conjure the goofy lighthearted personality that founded Weasleys Wizarding Wheezes at any given moment to diffuse tension or simply entertain us on a rainy day. James is loud and obnoxious , not to mention the biggest drama queen Hogwarts has ever seen ( including the fat lady) but when things are serious for James it wears on him. As much as he may overreact , he is truly a good person and deep down I know how much he loves our family. Sometimes I think he uses histrionics as a defense mechanism, so I worry when he looks at me in that empty way.

"I don't know what it is about her Lily." He finally said. "But you know me, you know I wouldn't be wasting this much time on her if it wasn't worth it. This is something, it's supposed to be something I know it! And I'm not wrong, I'm never wrong when it comes to this stuff."

"I just don't think it's worth this much of your time."

"Why? Why isn't it? What else have I got going on? I've got to figure out what I want to do with my life before Hogwarts throws me out on my ass at the end of the year and my best friend is going to get swept up into the quidditch world and forget all about me . Everything is different now that we all have to grow up : Rose is crazy, Fred is growing facial hair , and Al isn't the bright eyed innocent little guy he used to be_"

"When was Al ever_"

"It's all gone to shit. And I've got a dead end waiting in front of me. I can see it clear as day. And Julie _ Julie just feels like something that is meant to be. What am I supposed to do, turn away from the only lead I have?"

I sighed "James we just don't want to see you get hurt."

"And that's exactly how I feel about you." He looked back pointedly at Austin. "Thanks for the talk Lil, but I've gotta be off. I've got a pen pal to woo."

He stood up, brushed himself off, and started walking towards the castle "Careful with my little sister Austin, she sounds so wise and can handle herself on a broom better than almost any bloke I know but she's still only 14. Let's keep this platonic."

"James!" I shouted.

"I'm just saying! I trust you mate, please don't make me regret that."

Before I could scold him any further he was off , leaving us in a silence that "awkward" couldn't even begin to describe.

"James is ridiculous." I finally say.

It took Austin a second , since he was staring off into space, but eventually he threw his broom over his shoulder and looked at me "Technically he's right though. If we were in that situation , I'd be in the wrong. We should probably get into the air just in case Ravenclaw decides to come down early."

He started to walk away , and I suddenly became very upset. Why is it that I always end up boxed in by this family? Who is James to decide what is or isn't allowed to happen in my life? Austin is a great guy and if it were any other girl ( well besides Rose) he would be encouraging her to go after him. But I can't because I'm just silly, young Lily Luna Potter. I will always be 12 in their eyes so I'm just supposed to move on and pretend like nothing happened, pretend like there is nothing between me and Austin. I can't keep doing that. There has to come a point where I start making decisions for myself! I'm almost 15 bloody years old. James is daft if he thinks he's in control of my love life and Austin is daft if he thinks I'm just gonna let him walk away.

"Austin!" I said, grabbing his arm and pulling him to face me "We are in that situation. I'm pretty sure you're aware of that."

He stared "Lily please don't. It's beyond complicated_"

"Why is it that your relationship with them is more important than the one you could have with me?! They're just a bunch of boys I happen to be related too! This isn't 1547 they aren't going to come at you with swords drawn to defend my honor like I'm some helpless princess locked away in a damned bloody tower! You are not Nick Layndon Austin , you are their friend!"

His face flushed with frustration "Exactly! They're the only friends I have left! I don't want to betray their trust! Do you realize how horrible it is for me to befriend James and Al and then hit on their 14 year old sister?!"

"Excuse me but I'm 15, the common convention is to round up!"

"Well than I'm 17! I'm practically of age and you're a fifth year! I'm a bloody Slytherin! And a Slytherin that hasn't known you that long at that! How would you feel if you were in your brothers' shoes after what happened to Rose last year! Think about it Lily!"

"Look if you don't like me like that then just say so. I'll certainly understand if you'd rather pursue your relationship with my brothers."

He just shook his head at me and turned around again. This was not turning into the beautiful moment of revelation and embrace that I had expected. I guess because James was so bleeding miserable he had to ruin the lives of everyone else around him too.

"Why can't you just like me?" I said quietly "Just see me as Lily, not Lily Potter, and act on the feelings I know have been building up between us. I'm not just a sister and a daughter and a niece! I'm a girl! And if you're the kind of person that believes that your family can restrict or define who you are that I misjudged you terr_"

At first I thought that the presence of Austin's lips on my own was simply to shut me up. It started out forceful, but grew into something I had never felt before. It was comfort and security in someone that I hadn't grown up with. Austin seemed so perfect for me In that moment , and it was in that moment that I vowed not to pester James about wasting time on Julie, because if it was this feeling that he was after how could I discourage him?

Austin broke away suddenly , I kept my eyes closed for a few seconds as I was afraid I would open them to see a look of repulsion on his face. But he was just staring at me , staring and not speaking. There seemed to be a battle going on in his head , and all I could do was hope that my side was winning.

He sighed deeply and took a few steps away from me. Then he laughed once and turned around glaring up at the sky with a bitter smile. Had I not known him ( or experienced that mind-blowing kiss) I would have thought he was mad.

"Dammit Lily!" he said suddenly " We were just supposed to come down here and fly!"

I tried not to look hurt " I'm Sor_"

Again Austin has silenced me with his lips and again my brain turned to the kind of mush you read about in romance stories in Witch Weekly. Somehow I was kissing Austin Bentley , and I mean avidly kissing Austin Bentley. There was no one to interrupt, no rainstorm, no unfortunate incident of bird droppings or spontaneous combustion , just me and him in the middle of the pitch, in our own world.

"Do you mean it?" I asked when we had finally broke apart to catch ort breaths.

He laughed "Do I mean what Lily, that I really like you and am willing to stab the entire Gryffindor quidditch team in the back for a chance to be with you?"

I nodded sheepishly.

"I do mean it " he said "As long as you'll have me."

I smiled and kissed him quickly on the lips. Since he had asked me out wordlessly it was only right that I answered in the same way.

"You know I am on the quidditch team too" I said brightly.

"Only if someone breaks something."

I laughed and punched him playfully in the side.

"This means that Decklin is now the official third wheel" he said solemnly "poor guy , we really need to find him someone. Wood is bound to catch him staring at Rose eventually."

"I know but its hard. I mean Decklin is great he's just got a lot of _ quirks that girls will have to learn to love."

"Someone out there will. In the meantime we need to do what we came down here to do."

And we both climbed on our brooms and flew into the breeze as if nothing had changed , even though everything had.


End file.
